The All-True Travels and Adventures of Lidie Newton_ A Novel - Jane Smiley [252]
"What have you done with Lorna?"
"Did you think of that before you hatched your plot? Did you wonder how Lorna might suffer if your plot failed?—and many more of them do fail than succeed. The catchers are not a merciful or deliberate class of men. They do necessary work, and they have the necessary temperament for it."
"Where is Lorna?"
"Don’t adopt so high a tone with me, miss! What has become of Lorna is not your business, and I won’t allow you to think so by divulging her whereabouts. In fact, Lorna was never your business, though you claimed her as such. But I understand your late husband was an abolitionist, and I know that we expect ladies to be guided by their husbands, no matter what misguided views they themselves hold."
I supposed that if I told Papa that Lorna had claimed ME, it might be worse for her, wherever she was. I put my head down and bit my lip. Papa took this gesture as a submissive one. He continued, "I know, Mrs. Newton—for I know your true name now—that you have too fine a spirit to persist in folly and recklessness. I forgive you much in the name of your grief. The Lord himself knows that I was beside myself with grief for two years after my late wife passed on. Although you seem composed, of course much feeling runs deep. That’s the sort of woman you are. I can feel that. This foolishness of stealing my servant surely grows out of the mental instability produced by your experiences in this country at so young an age." He sighed.
"Lorna wanted to escape." But I whispered it.
"Ah, Lorna! No one could ever say that Lorna was ill-treated or uncared for. Lorna herself couldn’t say it and didn’t say it. In fact, she often expressed a wordless thanks to me for according her the privileges she exercised in my service. No one can ever convince me that Lorna doesn’t love us and doesn’t know the virtues of the position she held in our family until now. Delia said to me just yesterday, ’Massa Richard, dat Lorna don’ know nothin’, if she done dis thing! I tol’ her and tol’ her all dese yeahs to thank de Lawd for her blessin’s and fergit de res’, and I thought she done listened to me, but I see she ain’.’ Mrs. Newton, I have made a study of Lorna over these years, and I know her inside and out. Once in a while, once in every few years, even, something would seize Lorna and force her to act foolishly, to act against herself. My late wife felt it should have been beaten out of her at a young age, but I erred and could not take so strong a hand. Now I regret that. But Harris is always telling me that if you don’t beat them sooner you will beat them later, and you do them good to give them a taste of the lash—"
"Please!" I exclaimed. "I can’t bear this! You are wrong in every way! Down to the roots you are wrong!"
We stared at each other. His gaze went from my face to my bandaged hands and back to my face. His countenance was not hard but, instead, sympathetic, sentimental, without the least doubt of what he was saying and thinking. He sighed. He said, "You are so obdurate for such a young lady! I fear for you, I honestly do. Life itself will teach you what well-disposed elders cannot."
It was useless to talk to him, useless to talk to them all, but I tried a different tack, one last time. "Oh, sir, please do me that last kindness of telling me what has been done with Lorna! Please, I beseech you!"
First he shook his head, then a look of some pain crossed his face. Then, at last, he said, "I could only do what her actions demanded. I had to sell her south. She knew that would happen if she listened to your blandishments, and it did. She has only herself to blame. But I am weak enough to feel it. And it has broken Helen’s heart."
Mine, too, I thought.
Before leaving, Papa took my hand and kissed the bandage. His last words to me were, "This is a tragedy."
I continued