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By Root 1342 0

less gently and then much less gently, Jacob reflected that this wasn’t such a bad idea after all, that there was no earthly reason why a man and a woman shouldn’t take turns, trade places ever now and again, and equalize the work, if, as in the case, the woman enjoyed it as much as the man. Virdie cried out, a long low groan, but she didn’t stop, and Jacob realized that if she kept on going like that he might very well cry out himself. But just then a voice outside the wagon called “JAKE! AIR YE IN THAR?” and he knew it was Sarah. “ANSWER ME!” she requested, so he did. “Yeah, I’m in here, but I’ll be right out.” He was bucking beneath the weight of Virdie in an effort to finish. “WHAT’RE YE DOIN IN THAR, JAKE?” Sarah wanted to know. “I’m havin words—” he panted “—with this here Rebel foe.” He was nearly there, although he realized that the wagon must be visibly shaking. Virdie suddenly stuffed her dress into her mouth, but it was not enough to keep another one of her long groans from coming out. “JAKE!” Sarah hollered. “YOU AINT A-HURTING HER, AIR YE?” “Jist a little,” he answered, “to teach her a lesson.” And then he got there, rapturously, reflecting, Godalmighty, if I could git this reg’lar, maybe I’d jine the Rebels after all. Virdie climbed off him, smiling, and while he was buttoning his pants she kept her arms around him and her lips on his face and neck. He moved away from her to the door, opened it, and turned back to say to her, so Sarah could hear: “And jist remember what I said: no menfolks of Stay More air fightin on the Rebel side!” He meant it too.

But soon he heard a rumor that most of the men in Limestone Valley, to the south of Stay More, which had been Virdie Boatright’s previous “stand” (or “recline”) before coming to Stay More, had joined the Confederate army, or at least were preparing to fight as guerrillas on the Southern side. When he heard this, he issued an order of assembly for all men of Stay More, who dutifully gathered at the appointed time in the yard of Jacob’s dogtrot. Some of the men brought their wives and children, but he sent these away, declaring that the meeting was for men only. Then he addressed them, saying, “Nearly all you fellers bought new shootin arns from Eli Willard, and so did I. You heared what he said about all the rest o’ the country splittin off to fight. Now there’s that ’ere loose womarn come to town, Virdie Boatright, tryin to git you fellers to jine the Rebels. Most of you fellers have sampled what she’s givin away free—” Here he was interrupted by a general clamor of hand-clapping, hip-slapping, lip-smacking, finger-snapping, whistling, and grunts of pleasure.

“Maybe you’ve heared,” he went on, “that her perticular campaign, or whatever you’d call it, has converted Limestone Valley to the Rebels. That means we’ve got the enemy numberin up right over yon mountain—” He gestured to the south. “Unless—” and his eyes moved slowly from man to man “—unless some of you fellers don’t consider the Rebels enemies no more.” He paused, then demanded, “Wal? How many of you has she recruited?” To his astonishment, every man jack of them raised their hands, including, to his dismay and disbelief, his own brother Noah. “Noey?!” he exclaimed, turning to him. “Godalmighty, you wouldn’t be funnin me, would ye? Don’t give me that! Says who? Tell me another. Hooey! Can you tie that? Don’t make me laugh! I wasn’t born yestiddy. Git along with ye. My foot. What do you mean, anyhow? I won’t buy that. Like hell you did. Where do you get that stuff? You’re full of beans. Noey, fer cryin out loud, air ye shore ye heared my question right?”

“What does ‘recruit’ mean?” Noah asked.

“That means she has got ye to pledge or promise to jine the Rebel army.”

“Aw, naw!” Noah protested. “She never done that to me.”

“Me neither,” chorused several of the others.

“Wal, then,” Jacob asked, “how many of you has she made pledge or promise to jine the Rebel army?” Not a single man raised his hand. “Wal, what in thunderation did y’all think I meant by ‘recruit’?” He addressed this question to the men