The Autobiography of a Quack [7]
in the bus a half-hour. A large, well-dressed man near by said, with a laugh, ``Rather neat, that,'' and, turning, tried to pull up a window-sash. In the effort something happened, and he broke the glass, cutting his hand in half a dozen places. While he was using several quite profane phrases, I caught his hand and said, ``I am a surgeon,'' and tied my handkerchief around the bleeding palm.
The guardian of manners said, ``I hope you are not much hurt, but there was no reason why you should swear.''
On this my patient said, ``Go to ----,'' which silenced the monitor.
I explained to the wounded man that the cuts should be looked after at once. The matter was arranged by our leaving the 'bus, and, as the rain had let up, walking to his house. This was a large and quite luxurious dwelling on Fourth street. There I cared for his wounds, which, as I had informed him, required immediate attention. It was at this time summer, and his wife and niece, the only other members of his family, were absent. On my second visit I made believe to remove some splinters of glass which I brought with me. He said they showed how shamefully thin was that omnibus window- pane. To my surprise, my patient, at the end of the month,--for one wound was long in healing,--presented me with one hundred dollars. This paid my small rental, and as Mr. Poynter allowed me to refer to him, I was able to get a better office and bedroom on Spruce street. I saw no more of my patient until winter, although I learned that he was a stock-broker, not in the very best repute, but of a well-known family.
Meanwhile my move had been of small use. I was wise enough, however, to keep up my connection with my former clients, and contrived to live. It was no more than that. One day in December I was overjoyed to see Mr. Poynter enter. He was a fat man, very pale, and never, to my remembrance, without a permanent smile. He had very civil ways, and now at once I saw that he wanted something.
I hated the way that man saw through me. He went on without hesitation, taking me for granted. He began by saying he had confidence in my judgment, and when a man says that you had better look out. He said he had a niece who lived with him, a brother's child; that she was out of health and ought not to marry, which was what she meant to do. She was scared about her health, because she had a cough, and had lost a brother of consumption. I soon came to understand that, for reasons unknown to me, my friend did not wish his niece to marry. His wife, he also informed me, was troubled as to the niece's health. Now, he said, he wished to consult me as to what he should do. I suspected at once that he had not told me all.
I have often wondered at the skill with which I managed this rather delicate matter. I knew I was not well enough known to be of direct use, and was also too young to have much weight. I advised him to get Professor C.
Then my friend shook his head. He said in reply, ``But suppose, doctor, he says there is nothing wrong with the girl?''
Then I began to understand him.
``Oh,'' I said, ``you get a confidential written opinion from him. You can make it what you please when you tell her.''
He said no. It would be best for me to ask the professor to see Miss Poynter; might mention my youth, and so on, as a reason. I was to get his opinion in writing.
``Well?'' said I.
``After that I want you to write me a joint opinion to meet the case--all the needs of the case, you see.''
I saw, but hesitated as to how much would make it worth while to pull his hot chestnuts out of the fire--one never knows how hot the chestnuts are.
Then he said, ``Ever take a chance in stocks?''
I said, ``No.''
He said that he would lend me a little money and see what he could do with it. And here was his receipt from me for one thousand dollars, and here, too, was my order to buy shares of P. T. Y. Would I please to Sign it? I did.
I was to call in two days at his house, and meantime I could think it over. It seemed to me a pretty weak plan. Suppose the young
The guardian of manners said, ``I hope you are not much hurt, but there was no reason why you should swear.''
On this my patient said, ``Go to ----,'' which silenced the monitor.
I explained to the wounded man that the cuts should be looked after at once. The matter was arranged by our leaving the 'bus, and, as the rain had let up, walking to his house. This was a large and quite luxurious dwelling on Fourth street. There I cared for his wounds, which, as I had informed him, required immediate attention. It was at this time summer, and his wife and niece, the only other members of his family, were absent. On my second visit I made believe to remove some splinters of glass which I brought with me. He said they showed how shamefully thin was that omnibus window- pane. To my surprise, my patient, at the end of the month,--for one wound was long in healing,--presented me with one hundred dollars. This paid my small rental, and as Mr. Poynter allowed me to refer to him, I was able to get a better office and bedroom on Spruce street. I saw no more of my patient until winter, although I learned that he was a stock-broker, not in the very best repute, but of a well-known family.
Meanwhile my move had been of small use. I was wise enough, however, to keep up my connection with my former clients, and contrived to live. It was no more than that. One day in December I was overjoyed to see Mr. Poynter enter. He was a fat man, very pale, and never, to my remembrance, without a permanent smile. He had very civil ways, and now at once I saw that he wanted something.
I hated the way that man saw through me. He went on without hesitation, taking me for granted. He began by saying he had confidence in my judgment, and when a man says that you had better look out. He said he had a niece who lived with him, a brother's child; that she was out of health and ought not to marry, which was what she meant to do. She was scared about her health, because she had a cough, and had lost a brother of consumption. I soon came to understand that, for reasons unknown to me, my friend did not wish his niece to marry. His wife, he also informed me, was troubled as to the niece's health. Now, he said, he wished to consult me as to what he should do. I suspected at once that he had not told me all.
I have often wondered at the skill with which I managed this rather delicate matter. I knew I was not well enough known to be of direct use, and was also too young to have much weight. I advised him to get Professor C.
Then my friend shook his head. He said in reply, ``But suppose, doctor, he says there is nothing wrong with the girl?''
Then I began to understand him.
``Oh,'' I said, ``you get a confidential written opinion from him. You can make it what you please when you tell her.''
He said no. It would be best for me to ask the professor to see Miss Poynter; might mention my youth, and so on, as a reason. I was to get his opinion in writing.
``Well?'' said I.
``After that I want you to write me a joint opinion to meet the case--all the needs of the case, you see.''
I saw, but hesitated as to how much would make it worth while to pull his hot chestnuts out of the fire--one never knows how hot the chestnuts are.
Then he said, ``Ever take a chance in stocks?''
I said, ``No.''
He said that he would lend me a little money and see what he could do with it. And here was his receipt from me for one thousand dollars, and here, too, was my order to buy shares of P. T. Y. Would I please to Sign it? I did.
I was to call in two days at his house, and meantime I could think it over. It seemed to me a pretty weak plan. Suppose the young