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Phury:

Yes. That’s the beauty of memories. They don’t change and they’re never lost. And even if you can’t recall all of them anymore, the pathways they created in your brain are always with you. They’re the infinity for mortals.

J.R.:

(after a while) I’m supposed to ask you a lot of questions.

Phury:

(shrugging) Yeah, but I thought you’d appreciate this answer.

J.R.:

(smiling sadly) Which is?

Phury:

(puts hand on my shoulder) Yes, it’s still all here. And you can come back anytime you like. Always.

I stare out over the landscape of my childhood and think . . . well, shit. Isn’t this just like Phury. I’ve been totally sniped by his kindness and thoughtfulness.

Bastard. Lovely, lovely bastard.

But this is the essence of him. He knows what you need more than you do, and he delivers. And he’s also flipped the interview on its head, making it about me, not him. Which is also his way.

J.R.:

I’ll bet you give fantastic birthday presents, don’t you. The really freaky-thoughtful kind.

Phury:

(laughing) I think I do all right.

J.R.:

You wrap well, too, don’t you.

Phury:

Actually, Z’s the best bow man you ever want to see.

J.R.:

Who in your life would do something like this (sweeps arm around) for you?

Phury:

Lots of people. Cormia. My Brothers. The Chosen. And also . . . myself. Like the whole recovery thing? (Pauses.) This is going to come out way wrong, just totally nancy, but the whole stop-using thing? That’s my gift to me. For instance, right now, you’re glad you’re here, but it’s hard too, right? (I nod.) Well, recovery hurts like hell sometimes, and it gets lonely and sad too, but even at its most difficult moments, I’m grateful for it and I’m glad I’m in it. (Smiles a little.) For Cormia, it’s the same. Making the transition out of the strict traditions of the Chosen has been a real challenge for her. It’s not easy to completely restructure everything about your life. She and I . . . we kind of bond over that. I’m redoing the way I’ve lived, you know, as an addict for the last two hundred years, and I’m discovering who I really am. She’s doing a lot of the same work. We flounder and triumph together.

J.R.:

Is it true Cormia’s going to design Rehvenge’s new club?

Phury:

Yup, and she’s finished. They’re starting construction on it as we speak. And Wrath’s commissioned a new Safe Place facility from her as well. She’s thrilled. I bought her a CAD program and taught her how to use it . . . but she likes to do everything on paper. She has an office in Rehv’s Great House with an architect’s desk—no chair, she stands up when she’s drafting. I’ve bought her every book on architecture I can think of, and she’s devoured them.

J.R.:

Do you think the other Chosen will find mates?

Phury:

(frowning) Yes . . . although any males who come sniffing around are going to have to get through me first.

J.R.:

(laughing) You’re going to be as bad as Z with Nalla, huh?

Phury:

They’re my females. Every one of them. Cormia is my mate, and I love her in a deeper, very different way, but I am still responsible for the futures of the others.

J.R.:

Something tells me you’re going to do an outstanding job taking care of them.

Phury:

We’ll see. I hope so. I can tell you one thing, when it comes to their hellrens, I’m going to choose character over bloodline every time.

There’s a long silence that’s companionable, and after a while I let myself fall back in the grass and stare at the sky. The blue positively glows, and the white of the cotton-puff clouds is brilliant and a little blinding. The pair together remind me of fresh laundry for some reason, maybe because it’s all so sparkling clean and the sun is warm on me and everything smells so good. . . .

Yes, I think to myself, these are the colors I remember . . . the ones from childhood, their vividness enhanced by the wonder and the excitement of just taking them in.

J.R.:

Thank you for bringing me here.

Phury:

I didn’t do anything. This is just where you