The Children's Book - A. S. Byatt [300]
“I wanted you to have everything,” he said once. “I wanted you to go to University, and be a free woman.”
“You see what has happened,” said Florence, with a grim little smile, and then flung her arms round him. “No one could have cared for me better,” she said. “We have all been very happy.”
But this genuine cry of love was also made bitter by their sense—both of them in very different ways—that the coming of Imogen had broken the circle, and left the ends flying. And the time came when he must go, precisely back to Imogen and her unborn child. He said “I’ll come back, soon. I’ll write. I think Griselda will come, in the vacation. You must tell me everything—”
“This is all my fault, you know, not yours,” said Florence. Prosper looked weary.
“Some of it is certainly your fault. But I did not pay attention.”
“I shall read and read and plan a thesis,” said Florence, who had brought boxes of history books.
They dined late, by candlelight, the first night in Ascona. Prosper looked across the table at his daughter, and handed her a small box.
“I always meant you to have this,” he said. “It is your mother’s wedding ring. You will need to wear a ring.”
The ring was slender, and gold, with finely worked clasped hands. Florence tried it: it fitted exactly.
“You are very like her,” said her father. “Here, in Italy, you look Italian.”
He began to say something clumsy and heartfelt about the ring protecting, or bringing luck. And then he remembered how Giulia had died, and would have taken it back, if he could. Florence turned it in the creamy light, and it shone.
“I shall take care of it,” she said. “You have been so good to me, when I have been so wilful and bad.”
But she did not read. The lethargy of pregnancy came over her, and she sat on her little terrace, staring out at the mountain, doing little. People came past. Respectable, black-shrouded Italian peasants, driving goats, or sheep. Strange nature-worshippers, bearded, smiling, spectacled, with walnut skins and bare shanks over homemade sandals under vaguely biblical tunics. Women in broidered robes with flowers in their hair. Travelling musicians, with lutes. Rapid purposeful priests. Fat curates. She could not understand much of Amalia’s accent, and came to see that the young woman had put on an Italian, over her patois, in which she could say simple, and necessary things, but could not make conversation.
She went up to the clinic, at first in a pony-trap and then on foot, where she