The Choice - Nicholas Sparks [103]
Stephanie turned when she heard him enter. He could feel her trying to read his expression. She started toward him.
“Travis,” she said.
“Hey, Steph.” He removed his jacket, realizing he couldn’t remember the drive back home.
“Are you okay?”
It took him a moment to respond. “I don’t know.”
She put her hand on his arm. Her voice was gentle. “Can I get you something to drink?”
“A glass of water would be great.”
She seemed relieved to be able to do something. “Be back in a jiffy.”
He sat on the couch and leaned his head back, feeling as drained as if he’d spent the day in the ocean, fighting waves. Stephanie returned and handed him the glass.
“Christine called. She’s running a little late. Lisa’s on her way.”
“Okay,” he said. He nodded before focusing on the family portrait.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
He took a drink of water, realizing how parched his throat had become. “Did you think about the question I asked you earlier? About how far someone should go in the name of love?”
She considered the question for a moment. “I think I answered that.”
“You did. Sort of.”
“What? You’re telling me it wasn’t a good enough answer?”
He smiled, thankful that Stephanie was still able to talk to him as she always had. “What I really wanted to know is what you would have done if you were in my position.”
“I knew what you wanted,” she said hesitantly, “but . . . I don’t know, Trav. I really don’t. I can’t imagine having to make that kind of decision, and to be honest, I don’t think anyone can.” She exhaled. “Sometimes I wish you’d never told me.”
“I probably shouldn’t have. I had no right to burden you with that.”
She shook her head. “I didn’t mean it like that. I know you had to talk to someone about it, and I’m glad you trusted me. It’s just that it made me feel terrible for what you’ve been going through. The accident, your own injuries, worries about the kids, your wife in a coma . . . and then to have to make a choice whether or not to honor Gabby’s wishes? It’s too much for anyone to handle.”
Travis said nothing.
“I’ve been worried about you,” she added. “I’ve barely slept since you told me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. I should be the one apologizing to you. I should have moved back here as soon as it happened. I should have visited Gabby more often. I should have been around every time you needed to talk to someone.”
“It’s all right. I’m glad you didn’t walk away from your job. You worked hard to get there, and Gabby knew that, too. Besides, you were here a lot more than I thought you would be.”
“I just feel so sorry for what you’ve been going through.”
He slipped his arm around her. “I know,” he said.
Together, they sat in silence. In the background, Travis heard the heater click on as Stephanie sighed. “I want you to know that no matter what you decided, I’m with you, okay? I know, more than almost anyone, how much you love Gabby.”
Travis turned toward the window. Through the glass, he could see the lights from his neighbors’ houses gleaming in the darkness. “I couldn’t do it,” he finally said.
He tried to collect his thoughts. “I thought I could, and I even rehearsed the words I would say when telling the doctors to remove her feeding tube. I know that’s what Gabby wanted, but . . . in the end I just couldn’t do it. Even if I spend the rest of my life visiting her in the nursing home, it’s still a better life than one I could spend with anyone else. I love her too much to let her go.”
Stephanie gave him a wan smile. “I know,” she said. “I could see it on your face when you walked in the door.”
“Do you think I did the right thing?”
“Yes,” she answered without hesitation.
“For me, or for Gabby?”
“Both.”
He swallowed. “Do you think she’ll wake up?”
Stephanie met his eyes. “Yes, I do. I’ve always believed that. The two of you . . . there’s something uncanny about the way you are with each other. I mean everything—the way you look at each other, the way she relaxes when you put your hand on her back, the way you both seem to know