The Color Purple - Alice Walker [12]
Git moving, he say, sharp.
And then she look up.
Under all that powder her face black as Harpo. She got a long pointed nose and big fleshy mouth. Lips look like black plum. Eyes big, glossy. Feverish. And mean. Like, sick as she is, if a snake cross her path, she kill it.
She look me over from head to foot. Then she cackle. Sound like a death rattle. You sure is ugly, she say, like she ain’t believed it.
DEAR GOD,
Ain’t nothing wrong with Shug Avery. She just sick. Sicker than anybody I ever seen. She sicker than my mama was when she die. But she more evil than my mama and that keep her alive.
Mr. _____ be in the room with her all time of the night or day. He don’t hold her hand though. She too evil for that. Turn loose my goddam hand, she say to Mr. ____. What the matter with you, you crazy? I don’t need no weak little boy can’t say no to his daddy hanging on me. I need me a man, she say. A man. She look at him and roll her eyes and laugh. It not much of a laugh but it keep him away from the bed. He sit over in the corner away from the lamp. Sometime she wake up in the night and don’t even see. But he there. Sitting in the shadows chewing on his pipe. No tobacco in it. First thing she said, I don’t want to smell no stinking blankety-blank pipe, you hear me, Albert?
Who Albert, I wonder. Then I remember Albert Mr. ____ first name.
Mr. _____ don’t smoke. Don’t drink. Don’t even hardly eat. He just got her in that little room, watching every breath.
What happen to her I ast?
You don’t want her here, just say so, he say. Won’t do no good. But if that the way you feel... He don’t finish.
I want her here, I say, too quick. He look at me like maybe I’m planning something bad.
I just want to know what happen, I say.
I look at his face. It tired and sad and I notice his chin weak. Not much chin there at all. I have more chin, I think. And his clothes dirty, dirty. When he pull them off, dust rise.
Nobody fight for Shug, he say. And a little water come to his eyes.
DEAR GOD,
They have made three babies together but he squeamish bout giving her a bath. Maybe he figure he start thinking bout things he shouldn’t. But what bout me? First time I got the full sight of Shug Avery long black body with it black plum nipples, look like her mouth, I thought I had turned into a man.
What you staring at? she ast. Hateful. She weak as a kitten. But her mouth just pack with claws. You never seen a naked woman before?
No ma’am, I said. I never did. Cept for Sofia, and she so plump and ruddy and crazy she feel like my sister.
She say, Well take a good look. Even if I is just a bag of bones now. She have the nerve to put one hand on her naked hip and bat her eyes at me. Then she suck her teef and roll her eyes at the ceiling while I wash her.
I wash her body, it feel like I’m praying. My hands tremble and my breath short.
She say, You ever have anv kids?
I say, Yes ma’am.
She say, How many and don’t you yes ma’am me, I ain’t that old.
I say, two.
She ast me Where they is?
I say, I don’t know.
She look at me funny.
My kids with they grandma, she say. She could stand the kids, I had to go.
You miss ’em? I ast.
Naw, she say. I don’t miss nothing.
DEAR GOD,
I ast Shug Avery what she want for breakfast. She say, What yall got? I say ham, grits, eggs, biscuits, coffee, sweet milk or butter milk, flapjacks. Jelly and jam.
She say, Is that all? What about orange juice, grapefruit, strawberries and cream. Tea. Then she laugh.
I don’t want none of your damn food, she say. Just gimme a cup of coffee and hand me my cigarettes.
I don’t argue. I git the coffee and light her cigarette. She wearing a long white gown and her thin black hand stretching out of it to hold the white cigarette looks just right. Something bout it, maybe the little tender veins I see and the big ones I try not to, make me scared. I feel like something pushing me forward. If I don’t watch out I’ll have hold of her hand, tasting her fingers in my mouth.
Can I sit in here and eat with you? I ast.
She