The Color Purple - Alice Walker [17]
Sofia go on, frowning at her glass.
I don’t like to go to bed with him no more, she say. Used to be when he. touch me I’d go all out my head. Now when he touch me I just don’t want to be bothered. Once he git on top of me I think bout how that’s where he always want to be. She sip her lemonade. I use to love that part of it, she say. I use to chase him home from the field. Git all hot just watching him put the children to bed. But no more. Now I feels tired all the time. No interest.
Now, now, I say. Sleep on it some, maybe it come back. But I say this just to be saying something. I don’t know nothing bout it. Mr. _____ clam on top of me, do his business, in ten minutes us both sleep. Only time I feel something stirring down there is when I think bout Shug. And that like running to the end of the road and it turn back on itself.
You know the worst part? she say. The worst part is I don’t think he notice. He git up there and enjoy himself just the same. No matter what I’m thinking. No matter what I feel. It just him. Heartfeeling don’t even seem to enter into it. She snort. The fact he can do it like that make me want to kill him.
Us look up the path to the house, see Shug and Mr. _____ sitting on the steps. He reaches over and pick something out her hair.
I don’t know, say Sofia. Maybe I won’t go. Deep down I still love Harpo, but—he just makes me real tired. She yawn. Laugh. I need a vacation, she say. Then she go back to the woodpile, start making some more shingles for the roof.
DEAR GOD,
Sofia right about her sisters. They all big strong healthy girls, look like amazons. They come early one morning in two wagons to pick Sofia up. She don’t have much to take, her and the children clothes, a mattress she made last winter, a looking glass and a rocking chair. The children.
Harpo sit on the steps acting like he don’t care. He making a net for seining fish. He look out toward the creek every once in a while and whistle a little tune. But it nothing compared to the way he usually whistle. His little whistle sound like it lost way down in a jar, and the jar in the bottom of the creek.
At the last minute I decide to give Sofia the quilt. I don’t know what her sister place be like, but we been having right smart cold weather long in now. For all I know, she and the children have to sleep on the floor.
You gon let her go? I ast Harpo.
He look like only a fool could ast the question. He puff back, She made up her mind to go, he say. How I’m gon stop her? Let her go on, he say, cutting his eyes at her sister wagons.
Us sit on the steps together. All us hear from inside is the thump, thump, thump of plump and stout feet. All Sofia sisters moving round together at one time make the house shake.
Where us going? ast the oldest girl.
Going to visit Aunt Odessa, say Sofia.
Daddy coming? she ast.
Naw, say Sofia.
How come daddy ain’t coming? another one ast.
Daddy need to stay here and take care of the house. Look after Dilsey, Coco and Boo.
The child come stand in front of his daddy and just look at him real good.
You not coming? he say.
Harpo say, Naw.
Child go whisper to the baby crawling round on the floor, Daddy not coming with us, what you think of that.
Baby sit real still, strain real hard, fart.
Us all laugh, but it sad too. Harpo pick it up, finger the daidie, and get her ready for a change.
I don’t think she wet, say Sofia. Just gas.
But he change her anyway. Him and the baby over in a corner of the little porch out of the way of traffic. He use the old dry daidie to wipe his eyes.
At the last, he hand Sofia the baby and she sling it up side her hip, sling a sack of daidies and food over her shoulder, corral all the little ones together, tell ’em to Say Good-bye to Daddy. Then she hug me best she can what with the baby and all, and she clam up on the wagon. Every sister just about got a child tween her knees, cept the two driving the mules, and they all quiet as they leave Sofia and Harpo yard and drive on up past the house.