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if not I would at least be among the first on the next roll for the ensuing year — when of course my appointment was certain — when I mentioned that I feared my age would interfere he replied that 21 was the limit — that many entered at that time — & that I might call myself 21 until I was 22 — On leaving the office he called me back to endorse on my papers the name of my P. Office — I wrote Richmond. He said that I should certainly hear from him & that >>he<< regretted my useless trip to Washington — These are his precise words —

Having now explained every circumstance that seemed to require an explanation & shown that I have spared no exertions in the pursuit of my object. I write to you for information as to what course I must pursue — I would have returned home immediately but for the words [in] your letter “I am not particularly anxious to see you” — I know not how to interpret them[.]

I could not help thinking that they amounted to a prohibition to return — if I had any means of support until I could obtain the appointment, I would not trouble you again — I am conscious of having offended you formerly — greatly — but I thought that had been forgiven. at least you told me so —

I know that I have done nothing since to deserve your displeasure —

(space reserved for address)

As regards the poem, I have offended only in asking your approbation — I can publish it upon the terms you mentioned — but will have no more to do with it without your entire approbation — I will wait with great anxiety for your answer — You must be aware how important it is that I sh[ould] hear from you soon — as I do not know how to ac[t.]

I am Your’s affectionately

Edgar A. [Poe]

Edgar Allan Poe to John Allan — August 4, 1829

Baltimore Aug: 4 — /29

Dear Sir,

I am unable to account for your not answering — if you are offended with me — I repeat that I have done nothing to deserve your displeasure. If you doubt what I say & think that I have neglected to use any exertions in the procuring my warrant — write yourself to Mr Eaton & he will tell you that more exertions could not have been — the appt might have been obtained for June if the application had been made 2 months sooner & you will remember that I was under the impression that you were making exertions to obtain the situation for me, while I was at Old Point & so situated as to be unable to use any exertions of my own — On returning home nothing had been done — it is therefore unjust to blame me for a failure, after using every endeavour, when success was impossible rendered so by your own delay —

If you have not forgiven me for my former conduct — that is a different thing — but you told me that you had — I am however aware that I have many enemies at home who fancy it their interest to injure me in your estimation —

By your last letter I understood that it was not your wish that I should return home — I am anxious to do so — but if you think that I should not — I only wish to know what course I shall pursue —

If you are determined to do nothing more in my behalf — you will at least do me the common justice to tell me so — I am almost sure of getting the appt in Sepr & certain at any rate of getting it in June. if I could manage until that time I would be no longer a trouble to you —

I think it no more than right that you should answer my letter —

Perhaps the time may come when you will find that I have not deserved 1/2 the misfortunes which have happened to me & that you suspected me unworthily[.]

I am

Yours —

Edgar A. Poe

Edgar Allan Poe to John Allan — August 10, 1829

Baltimore

August 10th 1829.

Dear Pa,

I received yours this morning which releived (sic) me from more trouble than you can well imagine — I was afraid that you were offended & although I knew that I had done nothing to deserve your anger, I was in a most uncomfortable situation — without one cent of money — in a strange place & so quickly engaged in difficulties after the serious misfortunes which I have just escaped — My grandmother is extremely poor & ill (paralytic) [.] My aunt