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TIMON.

'Tis, then, because thou dost not keep a dog,

Whom I would imitate. Consumption catch thee!

APEMANTUS.

This is in thee a nature but infected,

A poor unmanly melancholy sprung

From change of fortune. Why this spade, this place?

This slave-like habit and these looks of care?

Thy flatterers yet wear silk, drink wine, lie soft,

Hug their diseas'd perfumes, and have forgot

That ever Timon was. Shame not these woods

By putting on the cunning of a carper.

Be thou a flatterer now, and seek to thrive

By that which has undone thee: hinge thy knee,

And let his very breath whom thou'lt observe

Blow off thy cap; praise his most vicious strain,

And call it excellent. Thou wast told thus;

Thou gav'st thine ears, like tapsters that bade welcome,

To knaves and all approachers. 'Tis most just

That thou turn rascal; hadst thou wealth again

Rascals should have't. Do not assume my likeness.

TIMON.

Were I like thee, I'd throw away myself.

APEMANTUS.

Thou hast cast away thyself, being like thyself;

A madman so long, now a fool. What, think'st

That the bleak air, thy boisterous chamberlain,

Will put thy shirt on warm? Will these moist trees,

That have outliv'd the eagle, page thy heels

And skip when thou point'st out? Will the cold brook,

Candied with ice, caudle thy morning taste

To cure thy o'ernight's surfeit? Call the creatures

Whose naked natures live in all the spite

Of wreakful heaven, whose bare unhoused trunks,

To the conflicting elements expos'd,

Answer mere nature- bid them flatter thee.

O, thou shalt find-

TIMON.

A fool of thee. Depart.

APEMANTUS.

I love thee better now than e'er I did.

TIMON.

I hate thee worse.

APEMANTUS.

Why?

TIMON.

Thou flatter'st misery.

APEMANTUS.

I flatter not, but say thou art a caitiff.

TIMON.

Why dost thou seek me out?

APEMANTUS.

To vex thee.

TIMON.

Always a villain's office or a fool's.

Dost please thyself in't?

APEMANTUS.

Ay.

TIMON.

What, a knave too?

APEMANTUS.

If thou didst put this sour-cold habit on

To castigate thy pride, 'twere well; but thou

Dost it enforcedly. Thou'dst courtier be again

Wert thou not beggar. Willing misery

Outlives incertain pomp, is crown'd before.

The one is filling still, never complete;

The other, at high wish. Best state, contentless,

Hath a distracted and most wretched being,

Worse than the worst, content.

Thou should'st desire to die, being miserable.

TIMON.

Not by his breath that is more miserable.

Thou art a slave whom Fortune's tender arm

With favour never clasp'd, but bred a dog.

Hadst thou, like us from our first swath, proceeded

The sweet degrees that this brief world affords

To such as may the passive drugs of it

Freely command, thou wouldst have plung'd thyself

In general riot, melted down thy youth

In different beds of lust, and never learn'd

The icy precepts of respect, but followed

The sug'red game before thee. But myself,

Who had the world as my confectionary;

The mouths, the tongues, the eyes, and hearts of men

At duty, more than I could frame employment;

That numberless upon me stuck, as leaves

Do on the oak, have with one winter's brush

Fell from their boughs, and left me open, bare

For every storm that blows- I to bear this,

That never knew but better, is some burden.

Thy nature did commence in sufferance; time

Hath made thee hard in't. Why shouldst thou hate men?

They never flatter'd thee. What hast thou given?

If thou wilt curse, thy father, that poor rag,

Must be thy subject; who, in spite, put stuff

To some she-beggar and compounded thee

Poor rogue hereditary. Hence, be gone.

If thou hadst not been born the worst of men,

Thou hadst been a knave and flatterer.

APEMANTUS.

Art thou proud yet?

TIMON.

Ay, that I am not thee.

APEMANTUS.

I, that I was No prodigal.

TIMON.

I, that I am one now.

Were all the wealth I have shut up in thee,

I'd give thee leave to hang it. Get thee gone.

That the whole life of Athens were in this!

Thus would I eat it. [Eating a root]

APEMANTUS.

Here! I