The Complete Works of William Shakespeare - Israel Gollancz William Shakespeare [1824]
SIR GODFREY.
Your husband's Fletcher, I warrant.
WIDDOW.
Oh! Let them come near, they bring home things of his. Troth, I should ha forgot 'em. How now, Villain? Which be those Archers?
[Enter the suitors Sir Andrew Tip-staff, Sir Oliver Muck-hill, and Penny-dub.]
FRAILTY.
Why, do you not see 'em before you? are not these Archers? what do you call 'em? Shooters: Shooters and Archers are all one, I hope.
WIDDOW.
Out, ignorant slave.
MUCK-HILL. Nay, pray be patient, Lady, We come in way of honorable love.
TIP-STAFF. We do.
PENNY-DUB. We do.
MUCK-HILL. To you.
TIP-STAFF. And to your Daughters.
PENNY-DUB. And to your Daughters.
WIDDOW.
O, why will you offer me this Gentlemen? indeed I will not look upon you--when the Tears are scarce out of mine Eyes, not yet washt off from my Cheeks, and my deer husband's body scarce so cold as the Coffin, what reason have you to offer it? I am not like some of your Widdows that will bury one in the Evening, and be sure to another ere morning. Pray, away; pray, take your answers, good Knights, and you be sweet Knights. I have vow'd never to marry;--and so have my daughters too!
PENNY-DUB. Aye, two of you have, but the third's a good wench!
MUCK-HILL. Lady, a shrewd answer, marry; the best is, tis but the first, and he's a blunt wooer, that will leave for one sharp answer.
TIP-STAFF. Where be your daughters, Lady? I hope they'll give us better encouragements.
WIDDOW.
Indeed, they'll answer you so; tak't a my word, they'll give you the very same answer Verbatim, truly la.
PENNY-DUB. Mum: Moll's a good wench still, I know what she'll do.
MUCK-HILL. Well, Lady, for this time we'll take our leaves, hoping for better comfort.
WIDDOW.
O never, never! and I live these thousand years! and you be good Knights, do not hope; twill be all Vain, Vain,--look you, put off all your suits, and you come to me again.
[Exeunt Sir John and Sir Andrew.]
FRAILTY.
Put off all their suits, quatha? Aye, that's the best wooing of a Widdow, indeed, when a man's Nonsuited; that is, when he's a bed with her.
[Going out, Muck-hill and Sir Godfrey.]
MUCK-HILL. Sir Godfrey, here's twenty Angels more: work hard for me; there's life int yet.
[Exit Muck-hill.]
SIR GODFREY.
Fear not, Sir Oliver Muck-hill, I'll stick close for you; leave all with me.
[Enter George Pye-board, the scholar.]
PYE.
By your leave, Lady Widdow.
WIDDOW.
What, another suitor now?
PYE.
A suitor! no, I protest, Lady, if you'd give me your self, I'd not be troubled with you.
WIDDOW.
Say you so, Sir? then you're the better welcome, sir.
PYE.
Nay, Heaven bless me from a Widdow, unless I were sure to bury her speedily!
WIDDOW.
Good bluntness: well, your business, sir?
PYE.
Very needful; if you were in private once.
WIDDOW.
Needful? brother, pray leave us; and you, sir.
FRAILTY.
I should laugh now, if this blunt fellow should put 'em all by side the stirrup, and vault into the saddle himself. I have seen as mad a trick.
[Exit Frailty.]
[Enter Daughters.]
WIDDOW.
Now Sir?--here's none but we--Daughters, forbear.
PYE.
O no, pray, let 'em stay, for what I have to speak importeth equally to them as to you.
WIDDOW.
Then you may stay.
PYE.
I pray bestow on me a serious ear, For what I speak is full of weight and fear.
WIDDOW.
Fear?
PYE.
Aye, ift pass unregarded, and uneffected; Else peace and joy:--I pray, Attention. Widdow, I have been a mere stranger for these parts that you live in, nor did I ever know the Husband of you, and Father of them, but I truly know by certain spiritual Intelligence, that he is in Purgatory.
WIDDOW.
Purgatory? tuh; that word deserves to be spit upon. I wonder that a man of sober tongue, as you seem to be, should have the folly to believe there's such a place.
PYE.
Well, Lady, in cold blood I speak it; I assure you that there is a Purgatory, in which place I know your husband to reside, and wherein he is like to remain, till the dissolution of the world, till the last general Bon-fire, when all the earth shall melt into