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The Complete Works of William Shakespeare - Israel Gollancz William Shakespeare [746]

By Root 21039 0
kidney. Think of that-that am as subject to

heat as butter; a man of continual dissolution and thaw. It

was a miracle to scape suffocation. And in the height of

this bath, when I was more than half-stew'd in grease, like

a Dutch dish, to be thrown into the Thames, and cool'd,

glowing hot, in that surge, like a horse-shoe; think of that

-hissing hot. Think of that, Master Brook.

FORD.

In good sadness, sir, I am sorry that for my sake you

have suffer'd all this. My suit, then, is desperate;

you'll undertake her no more.

FALSTAFF.

Master Brook, I will be thrown into Etna, as I

have been into Thames, ere I will leave her thus. Her

husband is this morning gone a-birding; I have received from

her another embassy of meeting; 'twixt eight and nine is

the hour, Master Brook.

FORD.

'Tis past eight already, sir.

FALSTAFF.

Is it? I Will then address me to my appointment.

Come to me at your convenient leisure, and you shall

know how I speed; and the conclusion shall be crowned

with your enjoying her. Adieu. You shall have her, Master

Brook; Master Brook, you shall cuckold Ford. Exit

FORD. Hum! ha! Is this a vision? Is this a dream? Do I sleep?

Master Ford, awake; awake, Master Ford. There's a hole

made in your best coat, Master Ford. This 'tis to be

married; this 'tis to have linen and buck-baskets! Well, I will

proclaim myself what I am; I will now take the lecher; he

is at my house. He cannot scape me; 'tis impossible he

should; he cannot creep into a halfpenny purse nor into

a pepper box. But, lest the devil that guides him should aid

him, I will search impossible places. Though what I am I

cannot avoid, yet to be what I would not shall not make

me tame. If I have horns to make one mad, let the proverb

go with me-I'll be horn mad. Exit

ACT IV. SCENE I.

Windsor. A street

Enter MISTRESS PAGE, MISTRESS QUICKLY, and WILLIAM

MRS.

PAGE. Is he at Master Ford's already, think'st thou?

QUICKLY.

Sure he is by this; or will be presently; but truly

he is very courageous mad about his throwing into the

water. Mistress Ford desires you to come suddenly.

MRS.

PAGE. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my

young man here to school. Look where his master comes;

'tis a playing day, I see.

Enter SIR HUGH EVANS

How now, Sir Hugh, no school to-day?

EVANS.

No; Master Slender is let the boys leave to play.

QUICKLY.

Blessing of his heart!

MRS.

PAGE. Sir Hugh, my husband says my son profits

nothing in the world at his book; I pray you ask him some

questions in his accidence.

EVANS.

Come hither, William; hold up your head; come.

MRS.

PAGE. Come on, sirrah; hold up your head; answer your

master; be not afraid.

EVANS.

William, how many numbers is in nouns?

WILLIAM.

Two.

QUICKLY.

Truly, I thought there had been one number

more, because they say 'Od's nouns.'

EVANS.

Peace your tattlings. What is 'fair,' William?

WILLIAM.

Pulcher.

QUICKLY.

Polecats! There are fairer things than polecats, sure.

EVANS.

You are a very simplicity oman; I pray you, peace.

What is 'lapis,' William?

WILLIAM.

A stone.

EVANS.

And what is 'a stone,' William?

WILLIAM.

A pebble.

EVANS.

No, it is 'lapis'; I pray you remember in your prain.

WILLIAM.

Lapis.

EVANS.

That is a good William. What is he, William, that does lend articles?

WILLIAM.

Articles are borrowed of the pronoun, and be

thus declined: Singulariter, nominativo; hic, haec, hoc.

EVANS.

Nominativo, hig, hag, hog; pray you, mark: genitivo,

hujus. Well, what is your accusative case?

WILLIAM.

Accusativo, hinc.

EVANS.

I pray you, have your remembrance, child.

Accusativo, hung, hang, hog.

QUICKLY.

'Hang-hog' is Latin for bacon, I warrant you.

EVANS.

Leave your prabbles, oman. What is the focative

case, William?

WILLIAM.

O-vocativo, O.

EVANS.

Remember, William: focative is caret.

QUICKLY.

And that's a good root.

EVANS.

Oman, forbear.

MRS.

PAGE. Peace.

EVANS.

What is your genitive case plural, William?

WILLIAM.

Genitive case?

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