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think on't, Jove, a foul fault! When gods have hot backs

what shall poor men do? For me, I am here a Windsor

stag; and the fattest, I think, i' th' forest. Send me a cool

rut-time, Jove, or who can blame me to piss my tallow?

Who comes here? my doe?

Enter MISTRESS FORD and MISTRESS PAGE

MRS.

FORD. Sir John! Art thou there, my deer, my male deer.

FALSTAFF.

My doe with the black scut! Let the sky rain

potatoes; let it thunder to the tune of Greensleeves, hail

kissing-comfits, and snow eringoes; let there come a tempest

of provocation, I will shelter me here. [Embracing her]

MRS.

FORD. Mistress Page is come with me, sweetheart.

FALSTAFF.

Divide me like a brib'd buck, each a haunch; I

will keep my sides to myself, my shoulders for the fellow

of this walk, and my horns I bequeath your husbands. Am

I a woodman, ha? Speak I like Heme the Hunter? Why,

now is Cupid a child of conscience; he makes restitution.

As I am a true spirit, welcome! [A noise of horns]

MRS.

PAGE. Alas, what noise?

MRS.

FORD. Heaven forgive our sins!

FALSTAFF.

What should this be?

MRS.

FORD. } Away, away.

MRS.

PAGE. } Away, away. [They run off]

FALSTAFF.

I think the devil will not have me damn'd, lest the

oil that's in me should set hell on fire; he would never else cross me thus.

Enter SIR HUGH EVANS like a satyr, ANNE PAGE as

a fairy, and OTHERS as the Fairy Queen, fairies, and

Hobgoblin; all with tapers

FAIRY QUEEN.

Fairies, black, grey, green, and white,

You moonshine revellers, and shades of night,

You orphan heirs of fixed destiny,

Attend your office and your quality.

Crier Hobgoblin, make the fairy oyes.

PUCK.

Elves, list your names; silence, you airy toys.

Cricket, to Windsor chimneys shalt thou leap;

Where fires thou find'st unrak'd, and hearths unswept,

There pinch the maids as blue as bilberry;

Our radiant Queen hates sluts and sluttery.

FALSTAFF.

They are fairies; he that speaks to them shall die.

I'll wink and couch; no man their works must eye.

[Lies down upon his face]

EVANS.

Where's Pede? Go you, and where you find a maid

That, ere she sleep, has thrice her prayers said,

Raise up the organs of her fantasy

Sleep she as sound as careless infancy;

But those as sleep and think not on their sins,

Pinch them, arms, legs, backs, shoulders, sides, and shins.

FAIRY QUEEN.

About, about;

Search Windsor castle, elves, within and out;

Strew good luck, ouphes, on every sacred room,

That it may stand till the perpetual doom

In state as wholesome as in state 'tis fit,

Worthy the owner and the owner it.

The several chairs of order look you scour

With juice of balm and every precious flower;

Each fair instalment, coat, and sev'ral crest,

With loyal blazon, evermore be blest!

And nightly, meadow-fairies, look you sing,

Like to the Garter's compass, in a ring;

Th' expressure that it bears, green let it be,

More fertile-fresh than all the field to see;

And 'Honi soit qui mal y pense' write

In em'rald tufts, flow'rs purple, blue and white;

Like sapphire, pearl, and rich embroidery,

Buckled below fair knighthood's bending knee.

Fairies use flow'rs for their charactery.

Away, disperse; but till 'tis one o'clock,

Our dance of custom round about the oak

Of Herne the Hunter let us not forget.

EVANS.

Pray you, lock hand in hand; yourselves in order set;

And twenty glow-worms shall our lanterns be,

To guide our measure round about the tree.

But, stay. I smell a man of middle earth.

FALSTAFF.

Heavens defend me from that Welsh fairy, lest he

transform me to a piece of cheese!

PUCK.

Vile worm, thou wast o'erlook'd even in thy birth.

FAIRY QUEEN.

With trial-fire touch me his finger-end;

If he be chaste, the flame will back descend,

And turn him to no pain; but if he start,

It is the flesh of a corrupted heart.

PUCK.

A trial, come.

EVANS.

Come, will this wood take fire?

[They put the tapers to his fingers, and he starts]

FALSTAFF.

Oh, oh, oh!

FAIRY QUEEN.

Corrupt, corrupt, and tainted in desire!

About him,