The Courage Tree - Diane Chamberlain [60]
“That’s understandable,” Lucas said. “He has a funny way of showing he cares, when he and your parents spend so much of their time and energy ganging up on you.”
She rolled onto her back. “Well,” she said, “the cat’s out of the bag, now.”
“Finally,” he said, and she was grateful to him for putting up with her reluctance to go public with their relationship. She stared at the ceiling. “I’m never going to be able to fall asleep,” she said.
“Try.” He leaned over to kiss her lightly on the lips. “Let’s both try. We’re going to need all our resources tomorrow.”
She must have dozed off, because it was a dream that awakened her. In the dream, she and Sophie were at the beach, and nothing in the world was wrong. Sophie was healthy, her body nut-brown and her cheeks rosy. Her red hair, pulled back into a thick ponytail, was much longer than it really was. They were building a sand castle together and talking about eating pancakes for dinner. It was a light and airy dream, and when she woke up and realized that there was no beach, no sand castle, no Sophie, she began to cry. She turned away from Lucas, who was sleeping soundly, not wanting to disturb him, and wept into her pillow.
He knew, though. She felt his hand on her back, slowly rubbing along the length of her spine through her T-shirt. He raised his hand to the back of her neck and massaged her there, where the muscles were so tight they hurt.
“I know this is hard,” he whispered, his breath against her neck. “Whatever happens, we’ll get through it together, Jan.”
She rolled over to let him take her in his arms. “I’m so scared,” she admitted.
“I know.”
“And I know everyone’s starting to think that she’s dead. That they’re all dead. And maybe it seems crazy, but I have this unbelievably strong feeling that she’s alive. I feel it in here.” She took his hand and held it against her abdomen, just below her rib cage.
“It’s not crazy,” he said. He reached beneath her T-shirt to rest his hand on her bare skin. “If you felt it in your toes, or your ears, or your knees, then you might be crazy,” he said. “But as long as you feel it here, I’d trust it.”
She laughed softly. “Don’t tease,” she said.
“I’m not teasing, sweetheart.” He kissed her softly on the lips. “I love you.”
His hand moved to her breast, his touch undemanding and gentle, and when he reached lower to slip his fingers beneath her underpants, she opened her legs to him. Never would she have guessed that she’d be making love tonight, but this was lovemaking borne of need rather than desire. It was soothing rather than passionate, with solace, rather than pleasure, as its goal. And afterward, she buried herself in his arms, and stayed nestled tightly in his embrace until morning.
They were both up before the sun. In the kitchen, Lucas made coffee while Janine called the police station, begging for news that didn’t exist. Both of them spun around at the sound of her father barging into the living room, and Janine knew that he had seen Lucas’s car in the driveway.
“What’s going on?” Frank asked, as she quickly hung up the phone. “What is he doing here? Are you all right, Janine?”
“I’m fine, Dad. And Lucas is here because he’s a friend.”
Her father didn’t seem to know what to say to that. He looked even more awkward than he usually did, and she felt sorry for him.
“He was here all night?” he asked finally.
“Yes.”
“Janine needed someone with her last night,” Lucas said. He had his coffee cup in his hand, and he rested it on the counter as if expecting to have to defend himself physically at any moment.
“Oh, she did, did she?” her father bellowed. “She could have had Joe here, or her mother or myself.”
Janine took Lucas’s hand in hers. “We’ve been seeing each other for quite a while, Dad. I didn’t want you and Mom to know because—”
“You’ve what? I don’t believe