The Courage Tree - Diane Chamberlain [69]
“It’s going to rain,” Rebecca said.
Joe opened his eyes again. Sometime in the last few minutes, the sky had grown dark and threatening. In the distance, there was the low rumble of thunder, and the sun was obscured by a thick bank of gray clouds.
“I’m sorry I let her go,” Janine said suddenly. She was speaking to him, and he turned to look at her.
“I know,” he said. “It’s not your fault.” He tried hard to sound sincere, although deep in his heart he blamed her. Just as he blamed Schaefer for coming up with the study, and Lucas for talking Janine into enrolling Sophie in it. And he blamed Alison and the Girl Scouts of America. He had to blame someone.
It began to rain as Steve returned with their drinks. The sky turned nearly black, and the clouds dropped lower to the earth. Lightning pierced the sky and the firemen and other rescue personnel had to shout to be heard above the beating of the rain on the trees and road.
Janine ignored the bottle of water Steve placed by her side on the gravel. She sat with her arms wrapped around her legs, her head hunched over her knees, and Joe wasn’t sure if she was crying or sleeping.
Then the first black bag was lifted over the edge of the cliff. It was hard to tell from this distance, but the bag looked quite large as it was carried to the ambulance. An adult was in there, Joe thought. Alison.
The second bag, though, was considerably smaller, and everyone sitting against the embankment in the rain grew instantly silent. Janine lifted her head from her knees. When she spotted the bag, she suddenly jumped to her feet and ran a few yards away from everyone to be sick in the bushes.
Joe beat Lucas to his feet. “Let me, damn it,” he said, and Lucas nodded.
Janine leaned against the embankment, her back to him, and he put his hand on the nape of her neck.
“It’s me,” he said, not wanting her to think it was Lucas behind her, touching her.
She turned toward him, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. She leaned into him, into an awkward, pained embrace. Her body shook with her tears.
“How can this be so hard?” she asked him finally. “We almost lost her so many times, and we knew we would lose her for good, soon. It’s not as though we weren’t prepared for this.”
“We weren’t prepared for this,” Joe said. “Not to have her die like this, in an accident, away from us.” His voice cracked, and he buried his head in her shoulder. That’s what hurt the most: thinking about Sophie dying without either him or Janine there. They had always been there for her. They had never left her alone. Never sent her off on her own this way.
Janine suddenly pulled away from him, a look of determination on her face. “I can’t stand this,” she said, and she started running down the road toward the ambulance. Joe followed her, the rain beating against his face.
“Let me see her!” Janine shouted at the woman standing near the entrance to the ambulance.
“I’m sorry,” the woman said, shaking her head, holding her hands up in front of her to keep Janine away.
“I’d know who it is if you’d just let me see her,” Janine pleaded. “I’d know my own daughter.”
As Joe reached the ambulance, one of the firemen took Janine by the arm. “We’ll know soon enough,” he said. He nodded to Joe, communicating without words that he should take Janine away from the ambulance and back to the side of the road.
Janine let herself be led away by him, looking back over her shoulder at the ambulance and the body bag.
“I don’t think it was Sophie in there,” she said, as Joe led her away. “Sophie’s smaller than that. Don’t you think?”
“I don’t know, Janine.” He had no idea. He hadn’t really looked at the bag long enough to have formed an opinion.
A squeaking, scraping noise came from the side of the cliff, and he and Janine both turned to follow the sound. A crane attached to the tow truck was lifting the car up from the cliff, the sheriff and rescuers guiding it, shouting instructions to one another. The beating rain made visibility difficult, but it was hard to miss