The Courtship - Catherine Coulter [89]
He did not come back.
Helen decided as she lay there that this simple punishment was much worse than she had ever imagined. It was a Level Three, at the very least. She would have to reevaluate her discipline scale.
Surely nearly a day had passed when finally the bedchamber door opened. Helen could have leapt on him, she was so glad to see him.
He pulled a chair close to the bed and sat down, stee pling his long fingers, tapping their ends together, rhythmically, slowly. She found herself staring at those fingers of his, remembering where they had touched her, and she shuddered, not enough for him to notice, but enough so that she felt it to her toes. And speaking of touching, why wasn’t he all over her? In the normal course of things, he couldn’t wait to be all over her. Here she was, laid out like an offering, and he was just sitting there, tapping his wretched fingers. What was wrong with him?
“One of the most efficacious disciplinary techniques I have ever discovered is what I call, as of this moment, ‘not quite ecstasy.’ ”
Helen’s heart began to pound, slow, deep strokes. Her face was alight with excitement. Spenser cleared his throat. “You see, Helen, you and I together are something I have never imagined happening in my life. I touch you and you become utterly wild.”
“I am not the only one here with no control. What do you do when I touch you?”
He nodded. “A good question. It is quite possible that I lose a good deal of my flawless technique, not that you would notice, since you want me so badly. I have considered this and discovered that it makes me smile, even laugh. Don’t you think that’s strange?”
“Since I have never even observed this flaunted technique of yours, I don’t know if laughter is strange or not.”
He sat forward, knowing he was going to goad her but good. “Well, you see, dearest, you are so utterly, well, I do hesitate to use so uncomplimentary a word, but it applies perfectly here and I wish to be honest. You are very easy, Helen. Compliant and submissive also apply. Perhaps even docile? There is no challenge to you at all. I have but to look at you with just a dollop of interest in my eyes, and you begin licking your lovely chops. I kiss you—all it takes is just a meager little kiss—and you’re ready to hurl yourself on your back and pull me down over you.
“You have, in short, given me no reason to assay a bit of my masterful technique. It is a bit depressing, all this utter easiness of yours, and it presents no challenge at all, and I do not believe one should be wasteful with one’s abilities and talents.” He sighed. “But, dearest, since I admire you so much, I am trying to adapt.”
He waited. He enjoyed the waiting, anticipating what she would do. He loved her outrage, and that was just what she delivered to him. Her face was flushed, her eyes glittered, and her lips became a thin line with cream on them. He wanted to kiss her silly, taste the tree-bark cream, but he merely sat there, his fingers steepled. He wasn’t about to unsteeple them and let them touch her, anywhere. He waited.
Then she looked him straight in the eye and said, “You are right about all of it. I am a creature with no will or control at all. It is very possible that any man could make me feel what you do. What do you think?”
He stared at her. He began to quake with his own outrage, which was filling him to overflowing, making him want to yell. “You,” he said very calmly, “are a blockhead, Helen. You don’t know anything. I plucked you out of the provinces and taught you how easy you are, but only with me. No other man who plucked you would find you remotely easy. You would probably knock anyone else across the room.
“It’s true. You’re an idiot. If you weren’t, you would realize that I am the only man in the world who can make you feel easy and compliant and willing to do just about anything I wish.