The Definitive Book of Body Language - Barbara Pease [92]
The “intelligent” look is reduced, however, if you wear glasses with oversized lenses, Elton John-style colored frames, or designer glasses with distracting initials on the frame. Wearing glasses that are one size larger than the face can make younger people look older, more studious, and more authoritative.
Solid frame glasses can make you look more sincere
and intelligent; over-the-top frames don't
In our study using pictures of people's faces, we found that when you add glasses to a face in a business context, respondents describe that person as studious, intelligent, conservative, educated, and sincere. The heavier the frame on the glasses the more frequently these descriptions were likely to be used and it made little difference whether the face was male or female. This could be because the leaders of business who wear glasses use heavier frames. So in a business environment, glasses are a statement of power. Frameless, small, or spindly frames convey a powerless image and say that you are more interested in fashion than business. The reverse holds true in social contexts, but in these situations you are selling yourself as a friend or mate. We advise people in positions of power to wear stronger frames to make serious points, such as reading a financial budget, and frameless styles when conveying a “nice guy” image or being “one of the boys.”
Stalling Tactics
As with cigarette smoking, the Glasses-Arm-in-Mouth action can be used to stall or delay a decision. In negotiating, it has been found that this gesture appears most frequently at the close when the person has been asked for a decision. Continually taking the glasses off and cleaning the lenses is another method used by glasses wearers to gain time for a decision. When this gesture is seen immediately after a decision has been asked for, silence is the best tactic.
The gestures that follow Glasses-Arm-in-Mouth signal the person's intention and allow an alert negotiator to respond accordingly. For example, if the person puts the glasses back on, this often means that he wants to “see” the facts again. Folding the glasses and putting them away signals an intention to terminate the conversation, and throwing the glasses onto the desk is symbolically rejecting the proposal.
Peering-Over-the-Glasses
Actors in films made during the 1920's and 1930's used Peering-Over-the-Glasses to portray, for example, a critical or judgmental person such as a teacher in an English public school. Often the person would be wearing reading glasses and find it more convenient to look over the tops, rather than removing them to look at the other person. But whoever is on the receiving end of this look may feel as though he is being judged or scrutinized. The habit of looking over the glasses can be a very costly mistake because the listener may respond to this look with negatives such as folded arms, crossed legs, or an argumentative attitude. If you wear glasses, remove them when speaking and put them back on to listen. This not only relaxes the other person, but allows you to have control of the conversation. The listener quickly becomes conditioned that when you take your glasses off, you're taking the floor, and when you put them back on, it's his turn to talk.
Peering-Over-the-Glasses intimidates everyone
Contact lenses can make your pupils appear dilated and moist and can also reflect lights. This can give you a softer, more sensual appearance, which is fine for social contexts but can be disastrous in business, especially for women. A woman can find herself trying her best to persuade a businessman to buy her ideas, while he is mesmerized by the sensual effect of her contact lenses and doesn't hear a word she says.
Tinted glasses and sunglasses are never acceptable in business contexts and arouse suspicions in social environments. When you want to convey that you see things clearly and precisely you must have clear glass in the frames—keep sunglasses and tinted lenses for outdoors.
Wearing Glasses on the Head
People who