The Diaper-Free Baby_ The Natural Toilet Training Alternative - Christine Gross-Loh [76]
Naturally, parents of multiples often feel daunted by EC. But I do know families who have incorporated it into their lives with success. In fact, the first time I ever saw EC practiced was when I was living with a host family in Japan. My host mother had twin baby granddaughters, and one day I saw her take the babies, one at a time, and cue them while holding them over a bowl! It was astonishing to me. Clearly, she didn’t feel that it was impossible to EC twins.
Remember that the situation varies from family to family. It’s not terribly different to EC multiples part-time than it is to change several diapers on two or more babies a day. It’s important to be aware of what you can handle whether you are EC’ing a singleton or multiples. That’s why I emphasize EC to any degree—the degree that’s right for you—throughout this book.
One of my close friends, Emily, is EC’ing twins. When they were first born, I told her that she did not need to feel pressure; there was plenty of time in the future to devote to EC. Plenty of windows of opportunity would certainly occur. But by following EC casually (by, for instance, cueing them while they pooped in a diaper, or simply by staying aware of their patterns), she was ensuring that she’d be open to those windows of opportunity when they came again.
When EC’ing multiples, it’s important to remember that your children are separate people, and that their development is most likely going to be different in every way. They are going to pass through all the stages of EC, and graduate, at their own individual pace. Be extra careful to be matter-of-fact about EC’ing so that the children don’t feel compared. Remember to have one potty for each child, and consider pottying them one at a time or pottying them separately so that they do not become confused if you are cueing one and not the other. (As they get older, this sort of confusion will be less of an issue.)
A Parent Speaks About EC’ing Twins:
I have practiced EC with my girls since birth. At first I wasn’t really sure it would work. My girls are very different in temperament and body type. Tsameret will cry out sharply when something bothers her. Moriah is more of an observer, but physically precocious. She is apt to pee while standing and will come to me with her pants already wet, while Tsameret is more likely to cry before she feels the urge to eliminate and come to me to catch her pees. Thus, EC’ing goes differently for each of them. But both girls are pretty much in sync when it comes to eating and sleeping, and so it goes for elimination as well. Often one will pee and the other will pee a split second later. I’ve learned, instead of cleaning after one pee right away, to look for the other girl and try to catch hers.
EC’ing with twins has not been an easy or smooth process because there is always the problem of not being able to tend to one while occupied with the other, especially in the early months. However, the advantage is that as they get older, they learn from each other!
After six months, they stopped signaling for a time. Eventually, we pretty much went diaperless because of diaper rash and other issues. Now they wear cotton or wool pants, and their signals have become much clearer!
As imperfect as our system is, it does seem as if we’re communicating and getting through to each other, and that is tremendously rewarding.
—LUCIA, MOM TO MORIAH AND TSAMERET, 9 MONTHS
Although EC’ing twins can be challenging, the advantage is that babies learn from each other as they grow.
EC’ING A CHILD WITH DISABILITIES
EC is helpful for children with disabilities, and I’ve spoken to several parents who are grateful to have practiced EC with their children because it helped them retain bodily awareness and provided a valuable means of communication between parent and child. Dr. Emily Davidson, an EC’ing mom and a pediatric instructor at Harvard