The Dovekeepers - Alice Hoffman [99]
I hurried home to see to my grandsons, stepping widely to avoid the shifting piles of salt that had gathered on the mountain from this wicked rain. Across the field, I spied Nahara walking with the Essene boy. Their women had presented her with one of their fine white shawls, now draped over her hair. Seeing her beside Malachi, sheltered by a length of the purest linen on earth, I knew before Nahara herself did.
She had become one of them.
AS THE RED MOON of Av pulsed, a new life ripened, pushing out the water inside Yael with the heat of his imminent arrival. She was kneeling at the fire where we cooked our meals when her skirts were suddenly drenched. I saw terror flare in her eyes. I hastily sent my grandchildren to Shirah, so she would know Yael’s time had come. Her son, Adir, could watch over the younger boys while we gathered to welcome the newborn child.
Yael and I began to make our way to the storerooms, stopping when she needed to yield and draw a breath. Her father had not once called for her during the last days of her pregnancy, when she’d been confined to our chamber, too heavy and uncomfortable to move. But her brother had visited. He had murmured an apology for disturbing our household, then had gone to kneel beside Yael, still in his silver armor, so that he shimmered in the half-light. I had heard them speaking of Jerusalem, occasionally bursting into laughter as they remembered the house in which they’d grown up, the flame tree that had stood in the marketplace. He came frequently after that, growing comfortable in our household, allowing my grandsons to climb over him and play at being warriors. Yael often teased her brother about Aziza, calling him a lamb who followed blindly after his beloved.
“Does she feed you hay?” Yael asked, and laughed. “Does she lock you in a pen at night?”
“Are you trying to anger me, Yaya?” Amram said with a grin, using her childhood name.
Yael brought out a scrap of blue, the bit of scarf he had given her that still remained. She waved the token to remind him that she kept it for luck, tucked beneath her sleeping mat. I’d seen it there myself. She failed to mention, however, that the swatch of cloth from the slave’s garment was hidden there as well.
During Amram’s visits, they didn’t discuss the baby to come, but the warrior once brought a rattle he had carved, with plum pits inside that clacked together when the toy was shaken. Yael was pleased, relieved that her brother had accepted her situation, whoever the father of her child might be.
“I blame myself,” I overheard him say to Yael one day. I imagined then that the father had been a comrade to him. “Never give something precious into the hands of another.”
“What I am about to bring into the world is precious,” Yael assured him. “So if you are to blame, then you are the one to whom I offer my gratitude.”
NOW THAT the time for the baby’s arrival had come, we walked through the evening light to the abandoned storeroom where we would meet Shirah. My arms were looped around Yael for support, allowing her to lean against me when the pains burst upon her. We paused on the stairs, where she doubled over, gasping, astonished by the force of the child within her.
“This is what he’ll do to you for the rest of his life, so be prepared,” I warned.
Yael tried to smile, but her pangs were too strong to allow it. She began to ramble in a low voice about a lion she had lost in the desert, a man she had loved, the price she must pay for her sins. I did my best to hush her. Her face was flushed with discomfort and heat. “I gave him back,” she murmured. “Isn’t that enough?”
I had no idea if she was speaking about the man or the beast or the child who was about to come. She seemed in the grip of a delirium. I was relieved to see Shirah hurrying across the field. She had called for Nahara, who had agreed to accompany her despite their falling-out. Nahara was barefoot, the white shawl of gauzy linen draped over her head. Her hair was braided in a single plait, in the fashion of the Essenes. Nahara and Shirah did not speak