The Education of Hailey Kendrick - Eileen Cook [73]
“I can’t go on vacation. I’ve got school.” I could feel my frustration growing.
“You let me take care of school. I’ll talk to your teachers and we’ll work something out. They can give you some projects to work on long-distance.”
“I don’t want you to take care of it.” My hands were balled into fists at my side.
His face fell. I could see he was hurt. “Okay. If you don’t want to go anyplace, we don’t have to.” He stared at his bowl of ice cream, then perked up with a smile. “Heck, you’re right. Who wants to deal with airlines and traveler’s tummy? We could go up to your grandparents’. We can rent a bunch of movies and hunker down, maybe play some board games. Remember how you used to kick my butt at Monopoly? I bet if we ask nice, we can even get your grandma to make her famous spaghetti and meatballs.”
“I don’t want to go to grandma’s, either. What I want is for you to listen to me! For once don’t try to solve the problem or shove it out of the way. Just listen!” I yelled.
My dad went silent, his face still for the first time. A nurse peeked in to see what the fuss was about, but backed out when she saw my dad. “I listen to you, Hailey,” he said.
“No, you don’t. You hear what you want to hear, or you end any conversation you don’t find comfortable.”
He rubbed the palms of his hands on his pants. “I should have told you about Linda. I realize now how wrong I was about that. I didn’t want you to think I was being disrespectful to your mom.”
I flopped back down onto the pillow. “This isn’t about Linda. And it isn’t about Mom, either. It’s about us.”
“What about us?”
“Just that. There is no us anymore. I don’t even know if you like me.”
My dad grabbed my hand. “Of course I like you. I love you. I love you more than anything else in my life.”
“Then, why is it you never want to be around me? First it was school, but then it was all the time. You’re always too busy. There’s always a good reason why you have to run off. Then you changed our summer plans. You say you love me, but you don’t even know me anymore.”
“That’s not true, Hailey.” He ran his hands through his hair. “I get distracted with work, but I’ve never taken my focus off of you.”
“Really? What’s my favorite subject?”
“You like science.” He looked relieved, as if I had asked him an easy question.
“It’s history. I act like it’s science because you like science. I figured it would give us something to talk about. I’m not even sure I want to major in it anymore.”
“But you get straight A’s in science.” He sounded confused.
“I don’t care!” I used my ice-cream spoon to point at the door. “Who was the guy that was here?”
“Drew?” My dad looked at the door as if he were hoping Drew would reappear and provide some answers. “I assume he’s one of your friends from school. Isn’t he the one dating your friend Kelsie?”
“Kelsie is dating my boyfriend, Tristan. Drew works the janitorial crew at Evesham.”
“A janitor?”
I could see my dad’s brain spinning, trying to figure out why a school janitor had shown up at the hospital to visit me. “Remember how Dean Winston assigned me to a cleaning crew as part of my punishment? That’s how I met Drew. He’s going to Yale.”
His eyebrows drew together as he tried to sort out what direction the conversation was going in. “He got a janitor job at Yale?”
“No. He got accepted there,” I said. “He’s going to major in English.”
“Oh. That’s good.”
“I think I like him.”
My dad nodded very seriously. “That’s good too. He seems like a very nice young man.”
“Except I blew it. He kissed me and I slapped him, and now he doesn’t want to be with me. All he wants is to be friends.” I grabbed my dad’s hand before he could say anything. “Please don’t tell me how you don’t know what to tell me and that mom is the one who would have handled this kind of boy-girl stuff. Mom is gone. I wish she wasn’t, but she is. You’re the only parent I’ve got left.”
My dad got up and moved so he could sit on the bed next to me. He had tears in his eyes. “I’m sorry, Hailey. I let you down. I let your mom down.