The Education of Millionaires - Michael Ellsberg [15]
So, how do we reconcile our deepest dreams of making a difference in the world—our dreams of leading a meaningful, impactful life, a life of purpose—with the stark reality that the world doesn’t always care what kind of difference we want to make or give us an A for effort?
Navigating these rocky existential waters is one of the most important aptitudes you could develop. Err too far in either direction, and it’s very unlikely you’ll end up happy in life. Err too far on the side of reaching for lofty dreams within your career, without any attention to existing market risks and constraints, and you may end up, as David did at twenty-one, in a hospital for malnourishment, at least metaphorically speaking. And few people who end up in that place of starving-artist-hood have the fortune to get out, as David eventually did.
Yet, err too far in the other direction, giving in to fear and sticking to the safe path, without even a nod to the larger impact you want to make, the greater purpose you want to achieve, and you may end up feeling like you missed out. You may enjoy some level of predictability or security in your income, but it won’t feel very satisfying to you inside. Few people would call this “success.”
Therefore, at the outset of any discussion of success, what you need is not another motivational rah-rah lecture on “believing in yourself” or “never giving up” or “working harder,” the standard fare of other books. What you need is an honest discussion of how to navigate gracefully among dreams, risk, and ruin in the real-world marketplace.
■ THE CONFLICT OF MAKING AN IMPACT VERSUS LIVING A PREDICTABLE LIFE
I’m going to say something that has probably never been in print before in a business book. It’s probably never been in a business book because, at face value, it sounds kind of depressing.
The bigger the impact you want to make on the world or in your chosen field—the bolder your purpose is—the greater the risks you’re going to have to take. Which means, the greater the chance that you’ll end up making no impact at all. Other than the impact of your ass hitting the floor and failing at your purpose.
In a moment, I’ll elaborate on why this conflict between safety and making a difference, between predictability and living your purpose, exists. I’ll also provide a detailed plan for navigating these rocky waters. But first, consider the following family drama, which plays out in thousands of households across America each year.
Dad and Mom have scrimped and saved for years, maybe even decades, to send their daughter to college, so that she can have a leg up on life. When Daughter gets to college, she decides to major in drama, or art history, or feminist critical theory. A fight ensues:PARENTS: But how are you going to earn a living from being a drama [or art, creative writing, philosophy, literature, poetry, feminist critical theory, underwater basket weaving, etc.] major? Where are the employment ads that say, “Now hiring full-time drama majors”?
DAUGHTER: But Mom and Dad, this is what I’m passionate about in life. Do you want me to live life as a faceless office drone, enriching a bunch of corporate fat cats, and let the art inside of me die?
PARENTS: Of course we support your passions in life. We just want you to have a backup plan in case the acting thing doesn’t work out. You’re so smart, you’ve always been such a good arguer. Why don’t you think about becoming a lawyer, like your cousin Sue? Then you can act on the side, on weekends. Acting is a wonderful hobby.
DAUGHTER: You just don’t understand me! Life isn’t just about boring job security! There are bigger things out there, more meaningful things, than how much money is in your bank account. You’ll always regret being the ones who didn’t allow me to go for my dreams [etc., etc.].
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