The Everything Kids' Giant Book of Jokes, Riddles, and Brain Teasers - Michael Dahl [53]
9, including the bus driver
What's am I?
There was no mystery I could not solve. All I needed was a magnifying glass and my good friend. It's elementary, my dear. Who am I?
Sherlock Holmes
What do you call an imaginary yacht?
A dream boat.
How did the dentist get across the river?
With a “tooth ferry.”
How do you fasten a railroad track together?
With a railroad tie.
What do you call an angry ship?
A steamed boat.
When does a truck sleep?
When it gets “tire-d.”
What is the opposite of a put-down?
A pick-up.
If three friends moved to the same town, and one lived on E-X Avenue, while another lived on E-Y Road, where does the third one live?
E-Z Street
What doesn't belong? Snow skis, Jet Ski, bus, motorcycle.
The Jet Ski — it's the only one that does n't travel on land
When Juan's plane left the ground it was 2 p.m. After flying for 2 hours, it landed — but the clocks at the airport showed that it was still 2 p.m. How can this be?
The air plane flew through 2 time zones
FUN FACT
LAUGHING OUT LOUD
Did you know that the older you get, the less you laugh? Babies laugh on and off all day long, while someone who is older may laugh only once a day. Now, make sure you don't miss your chance to laugh your head off!
Do you know what a watch does on vacation?
Time travel.
What did the space travelers eat on their flight?
Astro-nuts.
What's the last thing you see when a train goes by?
Its tracks.
Why wouldn't the police officer cross the road?
Because the light wasn't green.
Why did the army sergeant's car die?
Because its “tank” was empty.
What do accountants ride in?
A“tax-i.”
Words to Know
Amusement: What people do or use in order to entertain themselves or someone else. Silly or fun things are used to amuse people every day.
What's So Funny?
Ike the famous bike rider pedaled for hours on his bike only to find that he was right back where he started. What's so funny?
He was on his exercise bike at the gym.
What doesn't belong in this list? Pen, paper, spatula, notebook.
Spatula
Joey and his sister Hannah like to play “I Spy” when they travel in the car. They decide that this time the first person who “spies” the most legs on the trip wins! Joey sees 2 deer, 11 cows, 2 cats, and a spider. Hannah sees 1 turkey, 7 cows, 3 sheep, and 4 cats. Who won?
Joey with 68 to Hannah's 58
The class was really puzzled when the teacher asked them: “When can you see through the desert?” Do you know?
When it is heated to almost 3,000 degrees and the sand becomes glass
Funny Flight
First, figure out what word each picture puzzle represents. Then put the words in the proper order to finish what this silly traveler is saying. Write the numbers in the upper left-hand corner of each picture.
What did the thief get when he stole the tram?
Bus-ted!
What does an elephant always take on safari?
His trunk.
What do girl scouts put on their S'mores when they camp at the swamp?
”Marsh” mallows.
Where does dinnerware go on vacation?
To China.
As Mrs. Rockefeller was leaving the airport, she found herself accidentally trapped in the revolving glass doors. She had no luggage, no tools, and nobody was around. She eventually made a hole and escaped. How? Hint: Her name.
She cut a hole in the glass with her diamond ring
No matter how long the new department store clerk walked down the stairs, he could never seem to reach the basement. Why?
He was walking down the “up” escalator
Where in the World?
First unscramble the names of eight different places around the world. Then match each one to a riddle to discover eight popular vacation spots!
What's am I?
I am the brains behind Garfield's intelligent tricks. I also try to help Odie think of ways to get back at him. I have been “drawn” to fun for years. Who am I?
Jim Davis
Sydney and Sadie are cousins. One day, Sydney and Sadie went on vacation to Japan. Sadie's flight took 7 hours while Sydney's took 33. Both flights were nonstop and Sydney and Sadie