The Everything Kids' Giant Book of Jokes, Riddles, and Brain Teasers - Michael Dahl [64]
A stalking cap!
Why didn't the outside of the house understand what was so funny?
It was an “inside” joke.
What did the swingset say to the sand-box when the teeter-totter arrived?
Wow! Did you SEE what I SAW?
How can you tell when a toilet's not well?
It's flushed.
What's an envelope's favorite part of the house?
The “seal-ing.”
Why did the colander have to go to the doctor?
It was alittle strained!
Why couldn't the ball player ever go home?
He was out in “left” field.
Words to Know
Dream: A group of thoughts, images, and feelings that you experience during the REM (rapid eye movement) portion of your sleep. Another type of dreaming is day-dreaming — imagining something while you are awake.
What's am I?
I invented a test that used 10 different inkblots. These images helped psychologists try to understand how a patient thinks by what the person felt he or she was seeing in the blots. Who am I?
Hermann Rorschch
Mrs. Smith lives in a 20-story apartment building. She lives on the 15th floor, and yet she never passes by the 13th floor. What's the explanation?
Because 13 is thought to be an unlucky number, some apartment buildings don't have a 13th floor
Jasmine's dining room table has enough room for only 6 people, yet every night 8 eat there. How can that be?
There are 6 human family members plus the dog and the cat — the yeat under the table
One night 2 burglars broke into the Joneses' house. As soon as they were inside, they heard a voice. The burglars got scared and left. No one was home, so whom did they hear?
The announcer on the radio, which Sally Jones had forgotten to turn off
Every time Clarence went into the house, something went wrong, very wrong. Clarence would gain weight only to instantly lose it again. Once he even swore he was shrinking. But the next day he felt taller than ever. Why?
Clarence went to a fun house with distorting mirrors
Liza lives in a grey house, while Lisa lives in a house that's gray. What's the difference?
The spelling of “grey” and “gray”
TRY THIS
Inkblot Tests
To create your own inkblot guessing game or test, you will need 10 blots. To make them, all you need are 10 pieces of paper folded once and then opened. Pour a little bit of paint on one side of the paper. Then, refold the paper, pressing gently on the blot. Open the paper again and let the paint dry. Now all you need is someone to test. Start by asking, “When you look at this picture, what do you see?”
How did the tools get from the house to the tool store?
The compass gave directions, while the screwdriver drove.
When the princess arrived at the castle and found the new labyrinth, how did she feel?
Amaze-d!
What does Sir Galahad turn on when he gets scared at night?
Aknight light.
In Centerville, it normally takes 2 days to send a letter from one house to another — 1 day to mail it, and 1 to have it delivered. But Mrs. Smith always receives her mail the same day it is sent. How can that be?
She married the postman!
How could the carpenter know how tall to make his door just by using his hands?
He could cut the door according to his arms pan, because your arms pan is the same as your height
LET'S PLAY SPORTS
What's So Funny?
Keep Pedaling!
Lance Pedlin is a famous biker who can pedal for hours on his bike. One day, he got on and started pedaling, and he kept going and going, but when he was done, he was still where he started. What's so funny?
He was on his exercise bike
What happens when a clumsy football player plays ball?
Afield trip.
Why did the racecar driver jump into the pool?
He wanted to put in afew laps.
Why did the golfer have to buy new shoes?
He had a “hole in one.”
What did the high diver wear to his wedding?
A“swim” suit.
What does Dracula take with him when he goes to a ball game?
His bat.
What do dolphins wear to the beach?
Swim fins.
Words to Know
Sense: The ability to see, smell, hear, touch, and taste all of the things that you come in contact with are made possible by your 5 senses. Your