The Eyre Affair_ A Novel - Jasper Fforde [246]
“I’m sure you shall. We all enjoy it tremendously—do you think it shows?”
“I think it shows a great deal, Miss Dashwood.”
“Call me Marianne, if it pleases you.”
She stopped and thought for a moment, smiled politely, looked over her shoulder and then said:
“May I be so bold as to ask you a favor?”
“Of course.”
She sat on the seat with me and stared into my eyes.
“Please, I wonder if I might be so bold as to ask when your own book is set.”
“I’m not a bookperson, Miss Dashwood—I’m from the real world.”
“Oh!” she exclaimed. “Please excuse me; I didn’t mean to imply that you weren’t real or anything. In that case, when, might I ask, is your own world set?”
I smiled at her strange logic and told her: 1985. She was pleased to hear this and leaned closer still.
“Please excuse the impertinence, but would you bring something back next time you come?”
“Such as—?”
“Mintolas. I simply adore Mintolas. You’ve heard of them, of course? A bit like Munchies but minty—and, if it’s no trouble, a few pairs of nylon tights—and some AA batteries; a dozen would be perfect.”
“Sure. Anything else?”
Marianne thought for a moment.
“Elinor would so hate me asking favors from a stranger, but I happen to know she has an inordinate fondness for Marmite—and some real coffee for Mama.”
I told her I would do what I could. She thanked me profusely, pulled on a leather flying helmet and goggles that she had secreted within her shawl, held my hand for a moment and then was gone, running across the lawn.
25.
Roll Call at Jurisfiction
Boojum: Term used to describe the total annihilation of a word/ line/character/subplot/book/series. Complete and irreversible, the nature of a boojum is still the subject of some heated speculation. Some past members of Jurisfiction theorize that a Boojum might be a gateway to an “antilibrary” somewhere beyond the “ imagination horizon.” It is possible that the semimythical Snark may hold the key to decipher what is, at present, a mystery.
Bowdlerizers: A group of fanatics who attempt to excise obscenity and profanity from all texts. Named after Thomas Bowdler, who attempted to make Shakespeare “family reading” by cutting lines from the plays, believing by so doing that “the transcendental genius of the poet would undoubtedly shine with greater luster.” Bowdler died in 1825, but his torch is still carried, illegally, by active cells eager to complete and extend his unfinished work at any cost. Attempts to infiltrate the Bowdlerizers have so far met with no success.
UNITARY AUTHORITY OF WARRINGTON CAT,
The Jurisfiction Guide to the Great Library (glossary)
IWATCHED MARIANNE until she was no longer in sight and then, realizing that her “remain to enjoy you” line was the last of Chapter Five and Chapter Six begins with the Dashwoods already embarked on their journey, I decided to wait and see what a chapter ending looks like. If I had expected a thunderclap or something equally dramatic, I was to be disappointed. Nothing happened. The leaves in the trees gently rustled, the occasional sound of a wood pigeon reached my ears, and before me a red squirrel hopped across the grass. I heard an engine start up and a few minutes later a biplane rose from the meadow behind the rhododendrons, circled the house twice and then headed off towards the setting sun. I rose and walked across the finely manicured lawn, nodded at a gardener who tipped his head in reply and made my way to the front door. Norland was never described in that much detail in Sense and Sensibility, but it was every bit as impressive as I thought it would be. The house was located within a broad sweeping parkland which was occasionally punctuated by mature oak trees. In the distance I could see only woods, and beyond that, the occasional church spire. Outside the front door there was a Bugatti 35B motorcar and a huge white charger saddled for battle, munching idly on some grass. A large white dog was attached to the saddle by a length of string, and it had managed to wrap itself three times around a tree.
I