The Fifth Elephant - Terry Pratchett [88]
Either the dwarfs had cut into a huge geode, or they had with great care lined this small cave with quartz crystals until every surface reflected the light of the two small candles that stood on pillars in the middle of the sandy floor. The effect dazzled even Vimes, after the darkness of the tunnels.
“Behold,” said Dee gloomily, “where the Scone should be…”
A round flat stone, midway between the candles and only a few inches high, clearly contained nothing.
Behind it, water bubbled up in a natural basin and split into two streams that flowed around the stone and disappeared again into another stone funnel.
“All right,” said Vimes. “Tell me everything.”
“It was found missing three days ago,” said Dee. “Dozy Longfinger found it gone when he unlocked the door to replace the candles.”
“And his job is…?”
“Captain of the Candles.”
“Ah.”
“It’s a very responsible position.”
“I’ve seen the chandeliers. And how often does he go in there?”
“He went in there every day.”
“Went?”
“He no longer holds the position.”
“Because he’s a prime suspect?” said Vimes.
“Because he’s dead.”
“And how did that happen?” said Vimes, slowly and deliberately.
“He…took his own life. We are certain of this, because we had to break down the door of his cave. He’d had been Captain of the Candles for sixty years. I do not think he could bear the thought of suspicion falling on him.”
“To me he does sound a likely suspect.”
“He did not steal the Scone. We know that much.”
“But the robes you people wear could hide practically anything. Was he searched?”
“Certainly not! But…I shall demonstrate,” said Dee. He walked off along the narrow, metal-floored corridor.
“Can you see me, Your Excellency?”
“Yes, of course.”
The floor rattled as Dee came back. “Now this time I will carry something…your helmet, if you please? Just for the demonstration…”
Vimes handed it to him. The Ideas-taster walked back down the corridor. When he was halfway, a gong boomed and two metal grids dropped down out of the ceiling. A few seconds after that guards appeared at the far grille, peering in suspiciously.
Dee said a few words to them. The faces vanished. After a while, the grilles rose slowly.
“The mechanism is complex and quite old but we keep it in good working order,” he said, handing Vimes his helmet. “If you weigh more going out than going in, the guards will want to know why. It is unavoidable, it is still accurate to within a few ounces, and does not violate privacy. The only way to beat it would be to fly. Can thieves fly, Your Excellency?”
“Depends on which sort,” said Vimes absently. “Who else goes in there?”
“Once every six days the chamber is inspected by myself and two guards. The last inspection was five days ago.”
“Does anyone else go in there?” said Vimes. He noticed that Cheery had picked up a handful of the off-white sand that formed the floor of the Scone cave and was letting it run between her fingers.
“Not lately. When the new king is crowned, of course, the Scone will often be brought forth for various ceremonial purposes.”
“Do you only get that white sand in here?”
“Yes. Is that important?”
Vimes saw Cheery nod.
“I’m not…sure,” he said. “Tell me, what intrinsic value has the Scone?”
“Intrinsic? It’s priceless!”
“I know it’s valuable as a symbol, but what is it’s value in itself?”
“Priceless!”
“I’m trying to work out why a thief might want to steal it,” said Vimes, as patiently as he could.
Cheery had lifted up the flat round stone and was looking underneath it. Vimes pursed his lips.
“What is…she doing?” said Dee. The pronoun dripped with distaste.
“Constable Littlebottom is looking for clues,” said Vimes. “They are what we call…signs, which may help us. It’s a skill.”
“Would this letter speed your search?” said Dee. “It has writing on it. That is what we call…signs, which may help you.”
Vimes looked at the proffered paper. It was brown, and quite stiff, and covered in runes.
“I, er, can’t read those,” he said.
“It’s a skill,” said Dee, solemnly.
“I can, sir,