The Freedom Writers Diary - Erin Gruwell [13]
Diary 12
Dear Diary,
The past couple of days in Ms. Gruwell’s class we have been reading a book called Durango Street. Durango Street is about an African American teenager named Rufus, who was just released from juvenile hall. Before he left, he promised his probation officer he would stay out of trouble.
Most of the people in class can relate to Rufus. If they haven’t been in jail, they have a cousin, brother, or friend who has. Before reading this book I was ashamed of having gone to jail. I was afraid Ms. Gruwell would hold it against me. Rufus had problems with a gang called the Gassers. They were always picking on him. I had a similar problem when I was in junior high.
I was waiting for the bus after school when three wanna-be gangsters approached me. They started trying to make me angry, calling me names. It wasn’t what they were saying that made me mad. I was angry that they chose to pick on me because they thought I would just take it. As far as I was concerned, the fact that they were all bigger than me was not important. I had to prove to them that they did not have the right to pick on me because I was smaller than they were.
One of them swung at me, and missed—that was “his bad.” When I felt the rush of air from his fist whizzing past my face, I went crazy! I started kicking him in the head! The only thing that made me stop was when I saw his eyes roll back in his head as though he was dead. I didn’t realize I had done something really wrong until I saw the flashing lights of the police and the paramedics coming.
The police took me to the vice principal’s office to make a report. The vice principal called my parents to come to the school and pick me up, but no one was home. The police officer asked if there was any one else that could pick me up. There was no one. Then they asked the vice principal, “Do you want us to take him down to juvenile hall?” The vice principal answered, “Since his parents aren’t home, that would probably be the best thing to do.”
When I arrived at juvenile hall it was scary. They treated me like a criminal. They even took a mug shot. This was my first experience setting foot into a caged place. I was unlike any of the people surrounding me. Caged like beasts were murderers, rapists, gangsters, and robbers. The first night was the scariest. I heard sounds I had never heard before. Inmates banging on walls, throwing up their gang signs, yelling out who they are and where they are from. I cried on my first night.
I didn’t get in contact with my parents until my third day in jail. Every day I worried about when I would be free. I stayed in juvenile hall for five long and stressful days. It’s true what they say; being in jail is no way to live.
When I got out, I was paranoid. I didn’t want to go out and have fun with my friends. I still felt like a caged animal. Two weeks after my release from jail, I had to appear in court. The judge told me that I would be on probation for three years and have to do community service for a month and two weeks. I also had to pay the restitution of $1,500 to the boy I had beaten up. I haven’t gotten into any trouble since that day. Like Rufus, I turned my life around.
Diary 13
Dear Diary,
Ms. Gruwell has some pretty amazing teaching methods. Our class just read a book called Durango Street, and now we are making a movie of it. The book is about a young African American teenager named Rufus, who gets out of juvenile hall, lives in the projects, and tries to find his biological father.
When we found out that we were going to make a movie, both my friend and I wanted to play the part of Rufus. I wanted to play the part of Rufus because I live in the projects, too, and like him, I’ve never known my father. I couldn’t for the life of me fathom why my friend, this clean-cut guy who seemed to have no problems in the world, wanted to play the part of Rufus. At first