The Freedom Writers Diary - Erin Gruwell [85]
Diary 100
Dear Diary,
The words “Eviction Notice” stopped me dead in my tracks. I looked at the notice in disgust, and realized what my mother told me was true. It didn’t really dawn on me until I saw the notice; it didn’t seem real. I felt a big lump in my throat, and looked away. I knew that if I read the fine print I would start crying. It would probably say that we only had one week to pack our stuff and leave. The last time we got only five minutes.
This is my last year in high school. Why did this have to happen to me now? I only have one year left before I graduate and I don’t have a place to live. I don’t know what I’m going to do or where I’m going to go. I don’t even know if I’m going to be able to go to college. I think I will get a full-time job to help my mother. My mother doesn’t have a plan in mind and doesn’t know what to do. I’m stressed, I have knots in my stomach, and I have to start studying for school. But where am I going to study? I won’t have a place to stay in a week. I’m scared.
I can’t believe this is happening to me again. It’s been such a long time since I last got evicted. The last time this happened we lived in a good apartment in a nice neighborhood, and we finally had somewhere stable to live. One day the manager knocked on the door and simply told us to get all of our things together because we only had five minutes to get out. In shock, I rushed to grab all of my belongings. Then we lived in hotels. When we finally ran out of money we had to resort to the only place we didn’t have to pay rent, the streets. This gave me a new meaning of the saying “to sleep under the stars.” When we finally got a place to lay our things, we put all of our clothes on the ground to make a pallet for us to sleep on. It was so cold I don’t know how I went to sleep. I thought, “What if someone sneaked up on us in the middle of the night? What if something bad happened? Where were we going to use the bathroom?”
Even though I’m scared, I have to do something. Maybe I should drop out of school and get my GED after we get a place. It probably wouldn’t be so bad having a full-time job, perhaps two. I’m confused, I don’t know what to think. I have to go and find out if there are some family shelters nearby. Hopefully Ms. Gruwell can help me. It seems like hope is the only thing I have to hold on to.
Diary 101
Dear Diary,
I feel like crying and running out of this house and never returning. I have no idea where I am going to get $800! The landlord keeps on calling me and asking me if I have the money for rent. And just today, I received a letter in the mail saying that if I don’t send in my car payment within five days my car will get repossessed. Tomorrow it is going to be two months since my cousin was murdered and my parents left the country. Since then, I’ve been the head of the household, taking care of my younger sister and myself, working my mom’s job, baby-sitting to get extra money, cooking, cleaning, doing the laundry, and trying to keep my grades up in school.
Yesterday, my science teacher told me that I’m failing her class and I need to pass the class to graduate. I feel so depressed, all my life I was an A and B student and now I am failing. I’ve never gotten an