The Ginger Man - J. P. Donleavy [127]
Dangerfield crossed over Earl's Court Road and stood in front of an antique shop, rubbing his shoes on the back of his trousers. Put his hand into his pocket, took it out and held an open palm to the sky. Turning to watch the traffic in its Christmas Eve swarm. A taxi drawing to a screeching halt
The door of the taxi slams. Dangerfield turning away. And turning back suddenly. A man. With a cane squeezed under his arm, handing the taxi money and turning with a grin. I'm mad. Absolutely out of my mind or body or is this a street in heaven or are we all riding a fast road to hell? Or am I seeing an impostor or bogus bugger?
And with a wider grin. White gloved. Do I know anyone anymore who wears white gloves? Or this ebony cane. But it's this round face flowering angelically about a bud of pearly teeth and a roar of laughter right in my own. Get away, Percy Clocklan. Get away. The dirty ould madness coming upon me. Get away.
Into the speechless face of Dangerfield.
"Why you sneaky whore, Dangerfield, why didn't you tell me you were in London? For Jesus sake are you on your way to the grave?"
"Percy, if it's you, I can only say I might well be and I need a drink"
"I was going to ask if you had a mouth at all."
"I've got a mouth, Percy. But you've given me a terrible fright."
Percy Clocklan pointed with his black cane up the sidewalk to a lighted window. There was singing inside. Come ye merry gentlemen. And they came. Into the bar and surrounded by song. Two brandies.
"May I have a cigarette, Percy?"
"Anything. Anything you want. Keep the change, keep the change."
"Percy, I take all this on faith. Although from the taste of this brandy I'd say I was in a saloon bar at the Christmas. But allow me to point out that up till a minute ago you were dead."
"O the whores believed me."
"Malarkey was the only one with reservations. Said you wouldn't miss getting your money's worth out of the journey. All others were believers. But Jesus I'm very happy to see you alive and prosperous looking."
"Prosperous looking? I am prosperous. O they believed me. I finished off a bottle of Irish and thought it would be a shame to waste it. So I put the note in. I knew ould Malarkey would deny he ever knew me. And Jesus what about yourself?"
"Percy, I'm down. Things seem to get worse by the day. But I'll manage. Where were you going ? "
"Going to pay a surprise visit to Mac's for this party when I saw you standing out there on the pavement as if you had no home. I couldn't believe my eyes. I frightened the life out of the driver. You look a disgrace. What are you wearing at all? Bloody ould sacks and newspapers"
"Haven't seen my tailor for some time, Percy"
"Well you'll bloody well see him with me. I'll have you made one of the finest suits in England"
"Percy, tell me. Where did this prosperity come from?"
"Never mind where it came from. Never mind that. But I worked me ould fingers to the bone and got into a good thing. Now I'm making bags of money. Rolling it in. I left Ireland and I told myself I was going to make money and have plenty to drink and fuck. I've even bought meself a Rolls"
"Surely you're joking."
"Joking, me tit. I'll take you for a ride in it"
"This is too much for me, Percy. Christmas, the little boy Jesus and the cold Bethlehem all at once. I'm finished."
Clocklan reaching into his pocket, withdrawing a black wallet.
"This is the only thing I've left, that I arrived in England with, and I stole it from ould Tony's jacket in the kitchen with him in the back screaming for a cup of tea."
"Magnificent"
"The dirty eegit himself made it"
"A fine piece of work."
"If he'd get his ould carcass out of the pubs he'd be away."
Clocklan took five five-pound notes and handed them to Dangerfield.
"Percy, you don't know what this means."
"I know what it means and fair