The Hidden - Jessica Verday [31]
Ben shuddered. “Give me a thinker any day of the week. I like ’em brainy.”
“Didn’t think I’d hear that one from you.” I rolled my eyes at him.
“What can I say? I’m an equal opportunity kind of guy.”
A tall girl passed us, and I watched in astonishment as she tossed her hair and then smiled at Ben. “Man, you really do have to fight them off!” I said.
His face turned red, and he looked embarrassed. It was kind of funny to see him acting all shy, but we were almost to class, and I still didn’t know why he’d wanted to walk with me. Spotting a quiet corner by the water fountains, I steered him in that direction. “So, what did you want to talk about? Because I know it’s not your girl problems.”
He looked down at his feet. “I wanted to ask you something. But I don’t know how to ask it.”
“This isn’t going to be another one of those awkward moments when you tell me how much you want me and I have to politely decline, is it?” I teased.
“No, no.” Then he looked up. “Unless you want it to be.”
“I’ll pencil you in for next Thursday. You can declare your undying and eternal love for me then. Does that work for you?’
“Absolutely.”
He shuffled his feet again, and I felt my patience wearing thin. I wanted to grab him by the arm and just tell him to spit it out already. “Seriously. What’s up, Ben? What is it? You’re making me nervous here.”
He took a deep breath, like he was gathering up his courage, then said, “I’ve been dreaming about Kristen.”
“You … have?” I hadn’t been dreaming about her at all. Why was he?
“Yeah. And what’s strange about it is—you know how when you dream, there’s always some part that’s off? Like you can be going through your day at school, but everyone will have six eyeballs, or blue noses, or you’ll be in your underwear?”
I nodded.
“It’s not like that,” he said. “These dreams are almost … real. Classes, and study halls, and stuff like that. We sit and talk about all kinds of things. For hours. It happens almost every night. Do you ever dream about her?”
I was almost tempted to say no. Some part of me didn’t want him to know that my dreams about my best friend were upsetting. Instead I found myself saying, “I used to. But I never got to just spend time with her in my dreams. Something was always wrong, or weird.”
“So you think … Do you think maybe she’s watching out for me? Or haunting me?” He laughed self-consciously and tugged on a piece of his curly brown hair. “I don’t even know if I believe in ghosts.”
“I do,” I said automatically.
“You do?”
I hadn’t meant for that to slip out. “Yeah. I, um, I do.”
Ben looked hopeful. “So do you think she is hanging around me?” He glanced around us, then lowered his voice. “It’s not like I want people to know that I think I’m being haunted by a ghost, but …” A wistful smile appeared. “But I think it would be kind of cool if it did happen. With her.”
Yeah, it’s not so bad being haunted. Trust me on that one. “We were both connected to her. Me as her best friend, and you …” I smiled gently at him. “You as someone who wanted to be something more. There’s a bond there. I don’t think death can take that away.”
“But it’s not like she knew how I felt.”
“I think you’d be surprised how much they know.”
“They?” He looked skeptical.
“Ghosts. Spirits. The dearly departed.” I waved my hand around. “You know.”
He nodded in a vague sort of way that made me uncomfortable. Dangerous territory, Abbey. Watch what you say.
I put my fingers on his arm and made my tone very comforting and accepting. “What I mean is that you can believe whatever you want to believe. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with believing that somehow Kristen knew how you felt about her.”
His face cleared. “You’re right. And I like the idea that she’s happy. Wherever she is.”
“Me too.”
The bell rang, and I pulled away. “I have to go. I don’t want to get a late slip.”
“Thanks for talking to me about this, Abbey,” he said. “But, uh, can we just keep it between us?”
I grinned at him, then turned to go to class. “Keep what between us?”
I skipped