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between desires, 225; commitment and, 311; confirmation as “rightness of our choice,” 320–21, 347; deathbed clarification, 324, 346; detachment and, 9–10; discernment, 48, 62, 305, 326–37; drawbacks of good decisions, 337–38; emotions and, 322; experience and, 337; feeling downcast after, 311–12; First Method, six steps, 319–20, 322–23; First Time (clear and unmistakable choice), 313–15; God’s help in, 305, 308; between “goods,” 311; Ignatian spirituality and, 9–10; Ignatius gets a haircut and, 307–12; Ignatius’s practical techniques, 306–38; indifference and, 306–7, 311, 319, 322, 323, 365; Last Judgment clarification, 324, 346; meditation and, 316–20; no changes during time of desolation, 330–32; “pointer of a balance” image, 307; “pushes” and “pulls,” 329; “reflection-action-reflection,” 322, 365; Second Method (imagination), 317–18, 323–25, 346; Second Time (less clear), 315–18; spiritual consolation and desolation as central to, 308–9, 316, 320; Third Time (no obvious choice), 318–25; the “three times,” 313–25; three ways the “enemy” works, 332–36; of vocation, 343–47; what is “of God” and what is “not of God,” 326–29. See also Career; Discernment

De Guibert, Joseph, S.J., 2–3

De Jaer, André, S.J., 22, 188

Delp, Alfred, S.J., 290, 374

De Mello, Anthony, S.J., 40, 81, 89, 91, 136, 177–78, 384, 388; parable of “The Little Fish,” 102; parable of “The Diamond,” 177–78

De Polanco, Juan, S.J., 191, 196

De Sales, St. Francis, 258

Descartes, René, 135

Desire, 57–85; analogy of stream, 344–45; arising in prayer, 133; author Martin and, 59–62, 71–72, 75; clarity and, 75; common longings, 66–69; as communication from God, 61, 67, 75; competing, choosing between, 225; distinguishing between deep and shallow, 343; dreams of the heart, 344, 369–71; exaltation or happiness and, 72–74, 75; experiences of the desire for God, 63–80; feelings of incompletion and, 64–66; finding your vocation and, 339–88; to follow God, 76–77; for friendship, 265; the God who seeks and, 80–81; for holiness, 77–78; holy, 59, 61, 133; Jesus and Bartimaeus and, 57–58; Margaret Silf on, 60, 63; material wants, 58; “Outside-In” or “Inside-Out” approach, 63; praying for what you desire, 343; sexual, 58, 125–26; uncommon longings, 69–72; vocation and, 342–47; vulnerability and, 78–80

Detachment, 9–10, 121, 391, 392; from “drive to acquire,” 183; friendship and relationships, 243–46, 253; indifference and decision making, 306–7, 365; love and, 223; second degree of humility and, 207; of St. Ignatius Loyola, 18; in work environment, 360

Dineson, Isak, 75

Discerning Heart, The (Conroy), 262

Discernment, 48, 62, 305–38; individual, 268, 269; joke about, 317; Lonsdale on, 309, 316; obedience and, 272; “of spirits,” 189, 278, 326–29, 332–37; rules for, 326–37; spiritual consolation and desolation as central to, 308–9; “the drop of water,” 327–29; your desires and God’s desires for you, 279, 308, 316, 320, 338. See also Decision making

Discernment of Spirits, The (Gallagher), 189, 326

Disordered affections, 9, 180; defined, 10

Dissatisfaction or incompletion, 64–66

Doherty, Robert, S.J., 268, 272

Donovan, David, S.J., 5–7, 383; on falling in love, 224; God meets you where you are, 81, 143–45; God of Surprises, 49; God’s love for you, 385; God’s use of Ignatius’s pride, 12; on humility, 258; on lectio divina, 155; mother of, and praying the Rosary, 170; on prayer, 96, 114, 115, 140, 146, 151, 181, 328; “shoulding all over yourself,” 329; “you can’t put part of your life in a box,” 6–7, 27, 301, 334, 351

Dostoevsky, Fyodor, 230

“Downward Mobility” (Brackley), 183, 203

Draw Me into Your Friendship (Fleming), 207

Drinan, Robert, S.J., 273–74

Dulles, Avery Cardinal, S.J., 86–87, 234

Duty of Delight, The (Day), 96, 170

Dyckman, Katherine, 58

Easterbrook, Gregg, 182

Education: early work in, 24; famous people educated by Jesuits, 4, 17, 390; Jesuit colleges and schools, 4

Egan, Harvey, S.J., 162, 163

Elijah, 133

Emotions: arising in prayer, 132, 152, 168, 301–2; clarity and, 75; decision making and, 322; exaltation or happiness, 72–74, 75;