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By Root 653 0

meet Jason as he first stumbles onto his project’s central feature: that it might be possible for a teenager like himself to pull off what law enforcement and psychiatric experts have tried, and largely failed, to do—learn the homicidal tactics and secret fantasies of men who’ve killed twenty, thirty, even hundreds of times in the most grisly fashion imaginable. You’ll learn about the early childhood experiences that propelled Jason toward his bizarre hobby. You’ll see the reasons for his exaggerated self-importance, understand why cockiness occasionally creeps into his voice as he talks about his triumphs over these celebrity killers. Jason wanted so badly to be recognized and validated. He wanted to feel powerful. And what better way to do so than to deceive and control the world’s most famous human predators?

Jason’s personal motives aside, I believe that this story is unique in the annals of true-crime literature. By peering over Jason’s shoulder, we’re able to catch a glimpse at “the point of transaction,” the exact moment when a serial killer makes contact with his victim and begins to reel him in. We’re able to witness, through Jason’s senses, exactly what it looks and sounds like, what it feels like, to be manipulated, controlled, and dominated by a serial killer.

Yet this narrative is not just one precocious kid’s tale of a bizarre dance with the devil—or, rather, several devils. In a broader sense, it’s a portrait of the choreographed interactions between killers and victims everywhere. It describes, in excruciating detail, exactly how someone, even a person who is unusually vigilant, cautious, and intentional, can be drawn into the web of a killer who essentially makes a living stalking others.

Looked at one way, this is an adventure story in which a David attempts to take on a whole herd of Goliaths. Yet it is also an immensely disturbing narrative, sexually explicit, perverse, and filled with brutality; it requires a strong stomach.

One can’t help but ask what would lead a person, especially someone so young, to enter this world willingly. Why would a first-year college student spend his time researching ways to ingratiate himself with murderers? Why would he risk using himself as bait?

The truth is that many of us are fascinated with murder, killing, and violence. The whole genre of true-crime books testifies to that, as does the popularity of films and novels in which graphic murder plays a central role. Jason’s actions are thus emblematic of a culture in which violence is entertainment and murderers have become celebrities. Every new killer on the scene attracts his own share of groupies, fans, or spectators who can’t get enough details about the grisly crimes. Web pages are devoted exclusively to following the exploits of famous killers, analyzing the grisly details of their crimes. Ironically, the biggest challenge Jason faced when he embarked on this project was how to capture the interest of someone like Charles Manson or John Wayne Gacy, given that they enjoyed the attention of thousands of fans who wrote weekly, sending them gifts and vying for their attention.

Before committing to this project I first had to wrestle with certain ethical issues. As a therapist, and trainer of other therapists, among the most important values to me are authenticity and honesty, being completely open and straight with people. But here is a story in which a person resorts to deceit and manipulation to learn information that can’t be gained any other way. While I was impressed by all the things Jason learned, his modus operandi seemed fraught with moral conundrums.

In the end I believed this was an important story to tell, not only because of what it uncovers about homicidal relationships, but also what it reveals about our culture that so glorifies violence and turns killers into celebrities. If Jason’s experiences tell us anything, it is that pretending affinity with perpetrators of evil will, over time, wreak dire consequences on the psyche.

When Jason embarked on his quest, he was too young to realize what a