The Last Victim_ A True-Life Journey Into the Mind of the Serial Killer - Jason Moss [56]
This time, I didn’t have to wait long to hear back. He must have written me immediately after he read my letter. His response was again extremely polite, although accompanying the gracious words was a provocative photo of a naked man with a full erection. It obviously set the tone for the content of the words to come and represented a rather obvious attempt to seduce me.
He had much to say about the photo I’d sent him:
It looks like you have a great “swimmer’s” build, although it’s a bit hard to tell because you’re bent over in the picture. You certainly do have a handsome face. I’m glad you didn’t send a “polaroid,” because they don’t allow us to keep them. They’re afraid someone will lick the chemicals off the bottom strip or something.
He went on to give me detailed instructions regarding the additional photos he wanted me to send:
I’d like to see full body shots of you lying on the bed, hands behind your head, with your chest fully inflated. I’d enjoy photos of you reaching high for the ceiling. To me, there’s nothing more erotic than a handsome young man with a rock hard body and a slim tapering waist.
I couldn’t decide if I should feel flattered or utterly repulsed that he found me attractive. I suppose a little of both. I was pleased that he’d decided to trust me. He confided that the reason he didn’t normally respond to letters is that people always wanted something from him, usually his autograph. Apparently, he’d been disappointed previously in regard to things others had promised that they hadn’t delivered.
The letter ended with another apology for his photo requests: “Sorry, I don’t mean to sound demanding, it’s just that you’ve caught my interest; which is not always an easy thing to do!”
I anticipated that Dahmer would display mild intelligence and very average social abilities. I knew that the way he gained control over his victims was by drugging them. This was not the act of someone who was very confident or sophisticated in his interpersonal skills.
I hoped that as soon as I earned more of his trust, he’d be willing to really open up to me, as well as possibly let me visit him. I could already see early signs that he was relating to me just as he did to his prospective victims. He’d typically lure boys into his apartment by offering them money to pose for him. Once they were in his lair, he’d make sure they never left.
At the end of Dahmer’s letter he wrote, “I’ll be happy to accommodate you in the future if you’ll accommodate me.”
Quite frankly, this made me nervous. Gacy and Manson hadn’t been as direct in their requests as Dahmer. I was concerned he was getting too close, too fast. It reminded me of the saying “Be careful of what you wish for because you just might get it.”
In spite of my ambivalence, I sent Dahmer another letter in which I enclosed a picture of me at the beach with my shirt off, playing with some friends. I hoped that would hold him for a while, so I could get back to other aspects of my project—Gacy, Manson, et al.—that needed attention. I also told him I had some major exams to prepare for, so I’d write him again in a couple of weeks.
He responded immediately:
. . . your school work is important, and I completely understand your needing time for finals. Just don’t forget about me when your school work is done, ha ha. I have many things to do to keep myself busy anyway. Let me know when you’re ready to pursue a serious relationship. As long as you have the time without distraction, I would be more than open to it.
Of course, neither of us realized that Dahmer had a date with destiny—shortly after, he was murdered in prison by another inmate. Ironically, while most of the country was celebrating his death—or at least saying “good riddance”— I was feeling upset and disappointed. Here I had this great opportunity to explore Dahmer’s mind and learn things about the way he thought and operated, and, in an instant,