The Light of the Day - Eric Ambler [74]
“It is not their necks.” Miller looked resentfully at Fischer. “If you had not …” he began, but Harper cut him off sharply.
“We’ve been over all that, Leo. Now, why don’t you at least give it a whirl?”
Miller shrugged.
Harper looked at me. “We want to make an experiment, Arthur. Do you mind going over there and standing against the wall with your back against it?”
“Over here?”
“That’s right. Your back touching the wall.” He went over to Fischer, picked up a length of thick cord which was lying across the bandaged hands, and threw one end of it to me. I saw that the other end was attached to a leg of the settee. “Now here’s what it is, Arthur,” he went on; “I’ve told Mr. Miller that you can pull that settee six feet towards you just with the strength of your arms. Of course, your back’s leaning against the wall, so you can’t use your weight to help you. It has to be just your arms. Mr. Miller says you can’t do it, and he’s got a hundred-dollar bill that says he’s right. I’ve got one that says he’s wrong. If he wins, I pay. If I win, you and I split fifty-fifty. How about it?”
“I’ll try,” I said.
“Very well, begin,” said Miller. “Your shoulders against the wall, your heels not more than ten centimeters from it and together.” He moved over so that he could see that I didn’t cheat.
I have always detested that kind of parlor trick; in fact, I dislike any sort of trial of physical strength. They always remind me of a lot of boys I once saw in the school lavatories. They were standing in a row seeing who could urinate the farthest. Suddenly they started laughing and then began to aim at each other. I happened to get in the way and it was very unpleasant. In my opinion, rugger is the same kind of thing—just childish, smelly, homosexual horseplay. I always got out of it whenever I could. Today, any sort of exercise brings on my indigestion immediately.
Frankly, then, I didn’t think that there was the slightest chance of my being able to pull that heavy settee one foot, much less six. I am not particularly strong in the arms anyway. Why should I be? I have enough strength to lift a suitcase and drive a car; what more do I want?
“Go on,” said Miller. “Pull with all your strength!”
I should have done as he said and fallen flat on my face. Then, Harper would have lost a hundred dollars, and I should have been spared the ordeal. But Miss Lipp had to interfere.
“Just a minute, Arthur,” she said; “I tried this and I couldn’t do it. But you’re a man with a good pair of shoulders on you, and I think you can do it.”
Even if I had never heard her use the phrase “indignant sheep” about me, I would have known this heavy-handed guile for what it was. I do not have a good pair of shoulders on me. I have narrow, sloping ones. Women who think they can get away with that childish sort of flattery make me sick. I was really annoyed. Unfortunately, that made me go red. She smiled. I suppose she thought I was blushing because of her bloody compliment.
“I’m not much good at this sort of game,” I said.
“The thing is to pull on the cord steadily, Arthur. Don’t jerk it. Pull steadily, and when it starts moving, keep pulling steadily hand over hand. It’s an easy fifty dollars. I know you can do it.”
I was getting really browned off with her now. “All right, you bitch,” I thought to myself; “I’ll show you!” So I did the exact opposite of what she’d said. I jerked on the cord as hard as I could.
The settee moved a few inches; but, of course, what I’d done by jerking it, was to get the feet out of the dents they’d made for themselves in the thick carpet. After that, I just kept on pulling and it slid some more. As it got nearer it became easier because I was pulling up as well as along.
Harper looked at Miller. “What about it, Leo?”
Miller felt my arms and shoulders as if he were buying a horse. “He is flabby, out of condition,” he said sourly.
“But he did the trick,” Harper reminded him.
Miller spread out his hands as if to abandon the argument.