The Magic Mirror of the Mermaid Queen - Delia Sherman [78]
Airboy winked at me. “Great Queen,” he said, “our proposition is this: That you and the Green Lady make an alliance between the Park and the Harbor.”
The Mermaid Queen’s mouth opened and closed soundlessly, like a fish out of water. And then she screamed. “Not in a million, trillion, gazillion years! What’s with you, Oxygen? Do your job! Threaten the land girl! Torture her! Search her bag! I want my mirror! Now!”
Oxygen threw Airboy an unreadable look, then turned to the Queen. “With respect, Majesty, an alliance is not a bad idea.”
I expected a quick trip to the sharks for all of us, or a fairy fit at the very least, but the Queen sank down in the throne. “I don’t make deals with Land Folk,” she said sullenly.
This, somehow, was the last straw. “Well, that’s just peachy,” I snapped. “You don’t make deals; the Lady doesn’t make deals. All the other Geniuses make deals with each other all the time. That’s what we learn at Miss Van Loon’s, isn’t it, Oxygen?”
Oxygen chewed his lip.
“That’s what changelings are for,” I went on, “to make alliances. You know why the East Siders run practically the whole City? It’s because they make alliances. Yorktown, Fifth Avenue, Madison, Upper East Side, Midtown—they all have each other. Who does the Harbor have?”
“Nobody,” Airboy answered, just as if we’d practiced it. “The Harbor has nobody and nothing. They don’t even respect us, the East Siders, I mean. They think we’re stupid and violent and old-fashioned.”
“Wild,” I added. “Like the Park. That’s an insult, by the way.”
The Mermaid Queen flashed her pointed teeth. “Who cares what a bunch of dry-skins think? It’s not like they can hurt me.”
“How much garbage have they dumped in the Harbor?” Airboy asked. “How much bigger did the Harbor used to be, before they tore down all the hills and made Manhattan bigger?”
“You’re talking garbage,” the Queen snarled.
Oxygen swallowed nervously. “It’s true, Majesty. Don’t you remember? Castle Clinton used to be an island. Now it’s part of Manhattan. The Dragon did that.”
“Don’t believe us,” I said. “Ask the mirror. Which we solemnly vow and swear to give you the minute you agree to an alliance.”
The Queen’s trident pleated in a furious scowl. “Okay, okay. I promise I won’t salt Old Lady Tree-Hugger’s precious water. Now can I have my mirror back?”
Oxygen was silent. Airboy seemed to have used up all his words. I licked my lips. “The alliance,” I said. “Or no mirror.”
“Fish poop,” the Queen said. “What does an alliance mean, anyway? That the Lady says ‘jump’ and I say ‘how high?’ I don’t jump for nobody.”
Diplomacy is all about not letting Geniuses know how stupid you think they are. “It means,” I said, “that if the Harbor’s in trouble, she helps you out, and vice versa.”
“And you promise Her Leafiness won’t wiggle out of it if I need her?”
“Yes,” I said. “I promise.” Which was definitely a rash thing to do, given the Lady’s attitude toward the Mermaid Queen. But it was what I had to say, so I said it, and hoped I could make it stick.
The Mermaid Queen waved her tail fin thoughtfully. I watched slow ripples travel up the nuclear submarine tattooed on her tail, and reached nervously for my hair. When my fingers hit my air bubble, I heard a soft snort. I was glad Airboy could laugh. I was about ready to scream.
“I accept the alliance,” she said at last. “As long as Old Mud-Face watches my back, I’ll watch hers. But no funny stuff. And no riddles. Now, give me back my mirror.”
My fingers were shaking so hard with relief, I’d never have found the mirror if Satchel hadn’t pushed it into my hand.
As soon as I pulled it out, the Mermaid Queen grabbed it and began to examine it like a flower fairy searching a rosebud for signs of black spot. She grumbled over every ding and nearly pitched a fairy fit over the missing chain. But as soon as she turned it on, a smile rearranged the tattoos on her face.
Everybody relaxed, even the merguards.
Oxygen