The Mammoth Hunters - Jean M. Auel [120]
“Mind? No, I wouldn’t mind, if that’s what you want.”
Ayla thought she detected a little hesitation, but he did seem sincere. “Jondalar, I am only Ayla. I have no people. If I am adopted, I would have someone. I would be Ayla of the Mamutoi.” She stepped back, away from him. I need to think about it.”
She turned around and walked toward the pack she had been carrying. If I’m going to leave with Jondalar soon, I shouldn’t agree, she thought. It wouldn’t be fair. But he said he’d be willing to stay. For a while. Maybe, after he lives with the Mamutoi, he’ll change his mind and want to make this his home. She wondered if she was trying to find an excuse.
She reached inside her parka for her amulet, and sent out a thought to her totem. “Cave Lion, I wish there was some way I could know what is right. I love Jondalar, but I want to belong to people of my own, too. Talut and Nezzie want to adopt me, they want to make me a daughter of the Lion … the Lion Hearth. And the Lion Camp! Oh, Great Cave Lion, have you been guiding me all along, and I just wasn’t paying attention?”
She spun around. Jondalar was still standing where she left him, silently watching her.
“I’ve decided. I will do it! I will be Ayla of the Lion Camp of the Mamutoi!”
She noticed a fleeting frown cross his face before he smiled. “Good, Ayla. I’m glad for you.”
“Oh, Jondalar. Will it be right? Will everything turn out all right?”
“No one can answer that. Who could know?” he said, coming toward her, one eye on the darkening sky. “I hope it will … for both of us.” They clung to each other for a moment. “I think we should be getting back.”
Ayla reached for the parfleche to pack it, but something caught her eye. She went down on one knee, and picked up a deep golden stone. Brushing it off, she looked at it closer. Completely encapsulated within the smooth stone, which had begun to feel warm to the touch, was a complete winged insect.
“Jondalar! Look at this. Have you ever seen anything like it?”
He took it from her, looked it over closely, then looked at her with a bit of awe. “This is amber. My mother has one like it. She places great value on it. This one may be even better.” He noticed Ayla staring at him. She looked stunned. He didn’t think he’d said anything all that startling. “What is it, Ayla?”
“A sign. It’s a sign from my totem, Jondalar. The Spirit of the Great Cave Lion is telling me I made the right decision. He wants me to become Ayla of the Mamutoi!”
The force of the wind intensified as Ayla and Jondalar rode back, and though it was just past noon, the light of the sun was dimmed by clouds of dry loess soil billowing up from the frozen ground. Soon they could hardly see their way through the windblown dust. Flashes of lightning crackled around them in the dry, freezing air, and thunder growled and boomed. Racer reared up in fright as a bolt flashed and a clap of thunder cracked nearby. Whinney nickered anxiously. They dismounted to calm the nervous young horse, and continued on foot leading them both.
By the time they reached the Camp, winds of gale force were driving a dust storm that blackened the sky and blasted their skin. As they came close to the earthlodge, a figure emerged out of the wind-driven gloom holding onto something which flapped and strained as though it were alive.
“There you are. I was getting worried,” Talut shouted above the howling and thunder.
“What are you doing? Can we help?” Jondalar asked.
“We made a lean-to for Ayla’s horses when it looked like a storm was brewing. I didn’t know it would be a dry storm. The wind blew it apart. I think you’d better bring them in. They can stay in the entrance room,” Talut said.
“Is it like this often?” Jondalar said, grabbing an end of the large hide that was supposed to have been a windbreak.
“No. Some years we don’t have dry storms at all. It will settle down once we get a good snow,” Talut said, “then we’ll just have blizzards!” he finished with a laugh. He ducked into the earthlodge, then held back the heavy mammoth hide drape so Ayla and Jondalar could lead the horses