The Midnight Hour - Brenda Jackson [55]
"Especially not at Diamond Bay. Unlike some agents who made DB their home away from home while in-between assignments, I preferred not to do that and rented a little place in Charleston. The only time I went to Hilton Head was when I got a summons from Hawk or to leave on assignment."
He nodded. "You once mentioned you had lost someone you loved; a marine you were going to marry. What happened to him?"
Tori sighed deeply, knowing the story she and Hawk had fabricated for others. "He was killed in a car accident when he went home on leave one Christmas. I was supposed to join him there later."
"I'm sorry."
"Yeah, me, too." She stopped talking and glanced up at him. "Is there a reason for all of these questions, Drake?"
The eyes that met hers were serious, intense. "The night you mentioned losing your marine was the same night you brought up my relationship with Sandy Carroll. You had heard that she and I were engaged to be married at the time she was killed."
Tori swallowed deeply, wondering why Drake was bringing up anything about Sandy. She cleared her throat, knowing he was waiting on a response from her."Yes. I think most people had heard the two of you were an item."
Drake smiled. "Sandy and I were a lot alike. A perfect fit and everyone knew it. I respected her deeply and loved her more than life itself."
Tori glanced over at him and looked into his eyes. She immediately saw the pain still lodged there. It was pain that touched her heart. "In some ways, I think you still love her, Drake," she said softly.
'’Yes, I do," he said honestly. "What about you, Tori? Do you still love your marine?"
She turned away from Drake and glanced out of the window to look out at the stretch of rolling meadows they were passing. Her gaze then returned to his. "Yes, I still love him. It's been five years, but I still love him with all of my heart," she said quietly.
He accepted her response. Understanding it. For the next few minutes neither of them said anything. Then he spoke, "Do you ever compare other men to him? Look for similarities?"
Tori let out a sigh when she realized what must have happened. That night when they had made love, something had triggered a memory of Sandy. Someone once said that a person would know his or her lover no matter what face he or she had, due to something called a soul connection. Had Drake felt such a thing the night they had made love? The night their child had been conceived?
She knew that she wasn't at liberty to find out. Neither did she have a right. No matter what, she had to keep up with her facade and make sure he never discovered her true identity. "Sure, I think when you've lost a person you love deeply, you have a tendency to always compare and to go so far as to look for similarities in others although you don't intend to. But it was easy for me not to compare or look for similarities since my fiance was a tough act to follow."
She glanced over at him. "What about you? Do you compare? Look for similarities?"
"Yes," he said, "I do, actually. I think that's the reason I've been drawn to you. There's a lot about you that reminds me of Sandy."
Tori glanced over at him. A part of her was touched. Then another part, the one who had buried Sandy Carroll five years ago, was crushed.
Her life as Sandy had ended in that explosion. She wa* Tori now and wanted him to accept the new person that she was. Something snapped inside of her, making her feel angry, let down and upset even when she wasn't sure she had a right to feel that way.
For the longest time neither of them spoke again and Tori feigned sleep so he wouldn't ask her any more questions. She needed time to think about everything he had said and to deal with the fact that deep down, he saw her only as Sandy's replacement.
Drake pulled off the Interstate at the next exit when he noticed a variety of restaurants to choose from. They had switched cars in San Jose and were past Fresno. His goal was to reach Phoenix by nightfall. He pulled into the fast-food restaurant and since the drive-through line