The Mists of Sorrow_ Book Seven of the Morcyth Saga - Brian S. Pratt [136]
In a voice that’s barely above a whisper, he says, “But that’s not the worst of it.” He glances up to the priest, holds out his hand and creates one of his spheres. “You’ve seen me use this?” he asks.
Brother Willim nods gravely. “Yes,” he replies.
He rolls it around in his hand as he explains. “This is the most evil thing I have ever done,” he admits.
“Evil?” says Brother Willim. “I wouldn’t so name yourself, or your deeds.”
“You don’t understand.” Holding the sphere between his forefinger and thumb he brings it up in front of the brother’s face. “With this, I suck the life from people and use it to kill. First it leeches power from everything nearby, then I am able to utilize that power in various ways. Barriers, fire, explosions, you name it and I can do it.”
Nodding his head, Brother Willim remains silent as James continues.
“Isn’t that wrong?” he asks as his eyes turn to gaze at the sphere between his fingers. “To steal the life that the gods have given them?” He then goes quiet as the sphere disappears and he looks to Brother Willim for a response.
“Our lord Asran teaches us that to take the life of any living thing is wrong,” he says. “Whether it be birds, fish, insects…” and then he pauses a moment before adding, “or man. But we do need to survive, and so we kill animals to feed ourselves, clothe ourselves and so forth.”
“But men are not animals,” he insists.
“No, that is true,” he admits. “But let me ask you this. If a man was intent on taking your life, would you have any compunction whatsoever about removing one of your slugs from your belt and killing him with it? If that was the only way in which to preserve your life?”
“Yes, though I wouldn’t want to,” he replies.
“And later, would you agonize over it like you are doing now?” he asks.
“Not so much, no,” he admits.
“Whether you take the life of someone with a sword, knife, or even a slug, is no better or worse than what you are doing with your sphere,” he says.
“Then why do I feel this way?” he asks.
“You feel this way because you are a good man,” he explains. “Each person has within them the knowledge of right and wrong. Some say it is learned from those around them as they grow up, others believe that it comes from the gods.”
James nods. “I understand what you’re talking about,” he says. “My people call it a moral compass.”
“You are feeling this way because you are going against yours. You feel this is wrong, so your ‘moral compass’ is working to keep you from continuing down this path.” He pauses a moment to see what affect his words are having. When James makes no comment he adds, “Are you finding it easier to do the things you feel are wrong?”
“When I first discovered that the power within everyone could be taken and used, I was appalled and told myself that I would never do it,” he explains. “Or rather not to do it unless absolutely necessary. Now though, I seem to be doing it on a regular basis.” He turns pained eyes toward Brother Willim and says, “Now it’s almost as if it’s becoming a habit. I no longer even try to come up with another way.”
“The easiest path is often the most dangerous,” Brother Willim states. “The more you do what you know is wrong, the easier it will become the next time. And the next time.”
“What can I do?” James asks.
“The solution to your problem is simple,” he says. “Stop doing what you know is wrong.”
“But, that could cost us our lives if I don’t,” he replies.
Brother Willim gives him a look of sadness. “As long you can come up with reasons why you must do things against your ‘moral compass’, you will. We humans can reason anything to sound like a good idea. If taking the life of people in this manner is abhorrent to you, then don’t. Or resign yourself to continuing as you have.”
“What will happen to me if I continue?” he asks.
“I think you know,” he says.
They sit there in silence for awhile while each finishes their meal. James thinks about what Brother Willim