The Orphan Master's Son_ A Novel - Adam Johnson [110]
He shook his head no. She was so vulnerable before him, so pure—how did she stay so in this harsh world?
“So what are you, one of my husband’s new flunkies? Sent to check on me while he goes on a secret mission? Oh, I know about his secret missions—he alone is brave enough to infiltrate a whorehouse in Minpo, only the great Commander Ga can survive a week in a Vladivostok card den.”
He crouched beside her. “Oh, no. You judge him too harshly. He’s changed. Sure, he’s a man who’s made some mistakes, he’s sorry for those, but all that matters now is you. He adores you, I’m sure of it. He’s completely devoted to you.”
“Tell him I can’t take much more of this. Please pass that along for me.”
“I’m him now,” he said. “So you can tell him yourself.”
She took a deep breath and shook her head. “So you want to be Commander Ga, huh?” she asked. “Do you know what he’d do to you if he heard you assume his name? His taekwondo ‘tests’ are for real, you know. They’ve made an enemy of everyone in this town. That’s why I can’t get a role anymore. Just make up with the Dear Leader, won’t you? Can’t you just bow to him at the opera? Will you give my husband that request from me? That’s all it would take, a single gesture, in front of everybody, and the Dear Leader would forgive all.”
He reached to wipe her cheek, but she pulled away.
“These tears in my eyes,” she said. “Do you see them? Can you tell my husband of these tears?” she asked. “Don’t go on any more missions, please. Tell him not to send another flunky to babysit me.”
“He already knows,” he said. “And he’s sorry. Will you do something for him, a favor? It would mean so much to him.”
Lying on the grass, she turned to her side, her breasts lolling under the house robe, snot running freely from her nose. “Go away,” she said.
“I’m afraid I can’t do that,” he said. “I told you it’s been a long journey, and I’ve only just arrived. The favor is a small one, really, it’s nothing to a great actress like yourself. You know that part from A True Daughter of the Country, where, to find your sister, you must cross the Inchon Strait, still aflame with the sinking battleship Koryo, and when you wade in, you’re just a fishing-village girl from Cheju, but after swimming through the corpses of patriots in blood-red waters, you emerge a different person, now you are a woman soldier, a half-burned flag in your hands, and the line you say, you know it, will you say it to me now?”
She didn’t say the words, but he thought he could see them pass through her eyes—There is a greater love, one that from the lowest places calls us high. Yes, they were there in her eyes, that’s the sign of a true actress—being able to speak with just her expressions.
“Can you sense how right everything feels?” he asked her. “How everything’s going to be different? When I was in prison—”
“Prison?” she asked. She sat up straight. “How exactly do you know my husband?”
“Your husband attacked me this morning,” he said. “We were in a tunnel, in Prison 33, and I killed him.”
She cocked her head. “What?”
“I mean, I believe I killed him. It was dark, so I can’t be sure, but my hands, they know what to do.”
“Is this one of my husband’s tests?” she asked. “If so, it’s his sickest one yet. Are you supposed to report back how I responded to that news, whether I danced for joy or hanged myself in grief? I can’t believe he’s stooped this low. He’s a child, really, a scared little boy. Only someone like that would loyalty-test an old woman in the park. Only Commander Ga would give his own son a masculinity test. And by the way, his sidekicks eventually get tested, too, and when they fail, you don’t see them anymore.”
“Your husband won’t be testing anyone ever again,” he said. “You’re all that matters in his life right now. Over time, you’ll come to understand that.”
“Stop it,” she said. “This isn’t funny anymore. It’s time for you to leave.”
He looked up to the doorway, and standing there silent were the children—a girl perhaps eleven, a boy a little younger.