The Pool in the Desert [7]
to one. I should feel it much less if she occupied another cabin, and would consent to call me Elizabeth or Jane. It is not as if I had been her mother always. One grows fastidious at forty--new intimacies are only possible then on a basis of temperament--'
I paused; it seemed to me that I was making excuses, and I had not the least desire in the world to do that.
'How awfully rough on the girl!' said Dacres Tottenham.
'That consideration has also occurred to me,' I said candidly, 'though I have perhaps been even more struck by its converse.'
'You had no earthly business to be her mother,' said my friend, with irritation.
I shrugged my shoulders--what would you have done?--and opened 'La Duchesse Bleue'.
Chapter 1.III
Mrs. Morgan, wife of a judge of the High Court of Bombay, and I sat amidships on the cool side in the Suez Canal. She was outlining 'Soiled Linen' in chain-stitch on a green canvas bag; I was admiring the Egyptian sands. 'How charming,' said I, 'is this solitary desert in the endless oasis we are compelled to cross!'
'Oasis in the desert, you mean,' said Mrs. Morgan; 'I haven't noticed any, but I happened to look up this morning as I was putting on my stockings, and I saw through my port-hole the most lovely mirage.'
I had been at school with Mrs. Morgan more than twenty years agone, but she had come to the special enjoyment of the dignities of life while I still liked doing things. Mrs. Morgan was the kind of person to make one realize how distressing a medium is middle age. Contemplating her precipitous lap, to which conventional attitudes were certainly more becoming, I crossed my own knees with energy, and once more resolved to be young until I was old.
'How perfectly delightful for you to be taking Cecily out!' said Mrs. Morgan placidly.
'Isn't it?' I responded, watching the gliding sands.
'But she was born in sixty-nine--that makes her twenty-one. Quite time, I should say.'
'Oh, we couldn't put it off any longer. I mean--her father has such a horror of early debuts. He simply would not hear of her coming before.'
'Doesn't want her to marry in India, I dare say--the only one,' purred Mrs. Morgan.
'Oh, I don't know. It isn't such a bad place. I was brought out there to marry, and I married. I've found it very satisfactory.'
'You always did say exactly what you thought, Helena,' said Mrs. Morgan excusingly.
'I haven't much patience with people who bring their daughters out to give them the chance they never would have in England, and then go about devoutly hoping they won't marry in India,' I said. 'I shall be very pleased if Cecily does as well as your girls have done.'
'Mary in the Indian Civil and Jessie in the Imperial Service Troops,' sighed Mrs. Morgan complacently. 'And both, my dear, within a year. It WAS a blow.'
'Oh, it must have been!' I said civilly.
There was no use in bandying words with Emily Morgan.
'There is nothing in the world like the satisfaction and pleasure one takes in one's daughters,' Mrs. Morgan went on limpidly. 'And one can be in such CLOSE sympathy with one's girls. I have never regretted having no sons.'
'Dear me, yes. To watch oneself growing up again--call back the lovely April of one's prime, etcetera--to read every thought and anticipate every wish--there is no more golden privilege in life, dear Emily. Such a direct and natural avenue for affection, such a wide field for interest!'
I paused, lost in the volume of my admirable sentiments.
'How beautifully you talk, Helena! I wish I had the gift.'
'It doesn't mean very much,' I said truthfully.
'Oh, I think it's everything! And how companionable a girl is! I quite envy you, this season, having Cecily constantly with you and taking her about everywhere. Something quite new for you, isn't it?'
'Absolutely,' said I; 'I am looking forward to it immensely. But it is likely she will make her own friends, don't you think?' I added anxiously.
'Hardly the first season. My girls didn't. I was practically their only intimate
I paused; it seemed to me that I was making excuses, and I had not the least desire in the world to do that.
'How awfully rough on the girl!' said Dacres Tottenham.
'That consideration has also occurred to me,' I said candidly, 'though I have perhaps been even more struck by its converse.'
'You had no earthly business to be her mother,' said my friend, with irritation.
I shrugged my shoulders--what would you have done?--and opened 'La Duchesse Bleue'.
Chapter 1.III
Mrs. Morgan, wife of a judge of the High Court of Bombay, and I sat amidships on the cool side in the Suez Canal. She was outlining 'Soiled Linen' in chain-stitch on a green canvas bag; I was admiring the Egyptian sands. 'How charming,' said I, 'is this solitary desert in the endless oasis we are compelled to cross!'
'Oasis in the desert, you mean,' said Mrs. Morgan; 'I haven't noticed any, but I happened to look up this morning as I was putting on my stockings, and I saw through my port-hole the most lovely mirage.'
I had been at school with Mrs. Morgan more than twenty years agone, but she had come to the special enjoyment of the dignities of life while I still liked doing things. Mrs. Morgan was the kind of person to make one realize how distressing a medium is middle age. Contemplating her precipitous lap, to which conventional attitudes were certainly more becoming, I crossed my own knees with energy, and once more resolved to be young until I was old.
'How perfectly delightful for you to be taking Cecily out!' said Mrs. Morgan placidly.
'Isn't it?' I responded, watching the gliding sands.
'But she was born in sixty-nine--that makes her twenty-one. Quite time, I should say.'
'Oh, we couldn't put it off any longer. I mean--her father has such a horror of early debuts. He simply would not hear of her coming before.'
'Doesn't want her to marry in India, I dare say--the only one,' purred Mrs. Morgan.
'Oh, I don't know. It isn't such a bad place. I was brought out there to marry, and I married. I've found it very satisfactory.'
'You always did say exactly what you thought, Helena,' said Mrs. Morgan excusingly.
'I haven't much patience with people who bring their daughters out to give them the chance they never would have in England, and then go about devoutly hoping they won't marry in India,' I said. 'I shall be very pleased if Cecily does as well as your girls have done.'
'Mary in the Indian Civil and Jessie in the Imperial Service Troops,' sighed Mrs. Morgan complacently. 'And both, my dear, within a year. It WAS a blow.'
'Oh, it must have been!' I said civilly.
There was no use in bandying words with Emily Morgan.
'There is nothing in the world like the satisfaction and pleasure one takes in one's daughters,' Mrs. Morgan went on limpidly. 'And one can be in such CLOSE sympathy with one's girls. I have never regretted having no sons.'
'Dear me, yes. To watch oneself growing up again--call back the lovely April of one's prime, etcetera--to read every thought and anticipate every wish--there is no more golden privilege in life, dear Emily. Such a direct and natural avenue for affection, such a wide field for interest!'
I paused, lost in the volume of my admirable sentiments.
'How beautifully you talk, Helena! I wish I had the gift.'
'It doesn't mean very much,' I said truthfully.
'Oh, I think it's everything! And how companionable a girl is! I quite envy you, this season, having Cecily constantly with you and taking her about everywhere. Something quite new for you, isn't it?'
'Absolutely,' said I; 'I am looking forward to it immensely. But it is likely she will make her own friends, don't you think?' I added anxiously.
'Hardly the first season. My girls didn't. I was practically their only intimate