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"No. I hated you for something you really did."

"I never hated you, Cora. I hated myself."

"I don't hate you now. I hate that Sackett. And Katz. Why couldn't they leave us alone? Why couldn't they let us fight it out together? I wouldn't have minded that. I wouldn't have minded it even if it meant--you know. We would have had our love. And that's all we ever had. But the very first time they started their meanness, you turned on me."

"And you turned on me, don't forget that."

"That's the awful part. I turned on you. We both turned on each other."

"Well, that makes it even, don't it?"

"It makes it even, but look at us now. We were up on a mountain. We were up so high, Frank. We had it all, out there, that night. I didn't know I could feel anything like that. And we kissed and sealed it so it would be there forever, no matter what happened. We had more than any two people in the world. And then we fell down. First you, and then me. Yes, it makes it even. We're down here together. But we're not up high any more. Our beautiful mountain is gone."

"Well what the hell? We're together, ain't we?"

"I guess so. But I thought an awful lot, Frank. Last night. About you and me, and the movies, and why I flopped, and the hash house, and the road, and why you like it. We're just two punks, Frank. God kissed us on the brow that night. He gave us all that two people can ever have. And we just weren't the kind that could have it. We had all that love, and we just cracked up under it. It's a big airplane engine, that takes you through the sky, right up to the top of the mountain. But when you put it in a Ford, it just shakes it to pieces. That's what we are, Frank, a couple of Fords. God is up there laughing at us."

"The hell he is. Well we're laughing at him too, aren't we? He put up a red stop sign for us, and we went past it. And then what? Did we get shoved off the deep end? We did like hell. We got away clean, and got $10,000 for doing the job. So God kissed us on the brow, did he? Then the devil went to bed with us, and believe you me, kid, he sleeps pretty good."

"Don't talk that way, Frank."

"Did we get that ten grand, or didn't we?"

"I don't want to think about the ten grand. It's a lot, but it couldn't buy our mountain."

"Mountain, hell, we got the mountain and ten thousand smackers to pile on top of that yet. If you want to go up high, take a look around from that pile."

"You nut. I wish you could see yourself, yelling with that bandage on your head."

"You forgot something. We got something to celebrate. We ain't never had that drunk yet."

"I wasn't talking about that kind of a drunk."

A drunk's a drunk. Where's that liquor I had before I left?"

I went to my room and got the liquor. It was a quart of Bourbon, three quarters full. I went down, got some Coca Cola glasses, and ice cubes, and White Rock, and came back upstairs. She had taken her hat off and let her hair down. I fixed two drinks. They had some White Rock in them, and a couple of pieces of ice, but the rest was out of the bottle.

"Have a drink. You'll feel better. That's what Sackett said when he put the spot on me, the louse."

"My, but that's strong."

"You bet it is. Here, you got too many clothes on."

I pushed her over to the bed. She held on to her glass, and some of it spllled. "The hell with it. Plenty more where that came from."

I began slipping off her blouse. "Rip me, Frank. Rip me like you did that night."

I ripped all her clothes off. She twisted and turned, slow, so they would slip out from under her. Then she closed her eyes and lay back on the pillow. Her hair was falling over her shoulders in snaky curls. Her eye was all black, and her breasts weren't drawn up and pointing up at me, but soft, and spread out in two big pink splotches. She looked like the great grandmother of every whore in the world. The devil got his money's worth that night.

CHAPTER 13

We kept that up for six months. We kept it up, and it was always the same way. We'd have a fight, and I'd