The Price She Paid [132]
told me. Good-by.''
``He told Crossley! I wonder why.'' She was so interested in this new phase that she did not see his outstretched hand, or the look of bitter irony that came into his eyes at this proof of the subordinate place love and he had in her thoughts.
``I'm nervous and anxious,'' she said apologetically. ``Moldini told me he had some scheme about getting the money. If he only could! But no such luck for me,'' she added sadly.
Keith hesitated, debated with himself, said: ``You needn't worry. Moldini got it--from Crossley. Fifty dollars a week for a year.''
``You got Crossley to do it?''
``No. He had done it before I saw him. He had just promised Moldini and was cursing himself as `weak and soft.' But that means nothing. You may be sure he did it because Moldini convinced him it was a good speculation.''
She was radiant. She had not vanity enough where he was concerned to believe that he deeply cared, that her joy would give him pain because it meant forgetfulness of him. Nor was she much impressed by the expression of his eyes. And even as she hurt him, she made him love her the more; for he appreciated how rare was the woman who, in such circumstances, does not feed her vanity with pity for the poor man suffering so horribly because he is not to get her precious self.
It flashed upon her why he had not offered to help her. ``There isn't anybody like you,'' said she, with no explanation of her apparent irrelevancy.
``Don't let Moldini see that you know,'' said he, with characteristic fine thoughtfulness for others in the midst of his own unhappiness. ``It would deprive him of a great pleasure.''
He was about to go. Suddenly her eyes filled and, opening the outer door, she drew him in. ``Donald,'' she said, ``I love you. Take me in your arms and make me behave.''
He looked past her; his arms hung at his sides. Said he: ``And to-night I'd get a note by messenger saying that you had taken it all back. No, the girl in the photograph--that was you. She wasn't made to be MY wife. Or I to be her husband. I love you because you are what you are. I should not love you if you were the ordinary woman, the sort who marries and merges. But I'm old enough to spare myself--and you--the consequences of what it would mean if we were anything but strangers to each other.''
``Yes, you must keep away--altogether. If you didn't, I'd be neither the one thing nor the other, but just a poor failure.''
``You'll not fail,'' said he. ``I know it. It's written in your face.'' He looked at her. She was not looking at him, but with eyes gazing straight ahead was revealing that latent, inexplicable power which, when it appeared at the surface, so strongly dominated and subordinated her beauty and her sex. He shut his teeth together hard and glanced away.
``You will not fail,'' he repeated bitterly. ``And that's the worst of it.''
Without another word, without a handshake, he went. And she knew that, except by chance, he would never see her again--or she him.
Moldini, disheveled and hysterical with delight and suspense, was in the drawing-room--had been there half an hour. At first she could hardly force her mind to listen; but as he talked on and on, he captured her attention and held it.
The next day she began with Moldini, and put the Lucia Rivi system into force in all its more than conventual rigors. And for about a month she worked like a devouring flame. Never had there been such energy, such enthusiasm. Mrs. Belloc was alarmed for her health, but the Rivi system took care of that; and presently Mrs. Belloc was moved to say, ``Well, I've often heard that hard work never harmed anyone, but I never believed it. Now I know the truth.''
Then Mildred went to Hanging Rock to spend Saturday to Monday with her mother. Presbury, reduced now by various infirmities--by absolute deafness, by dimness of sight, by difficulty in walking--to where eating was his sole remaining pleasure, or, indeed, distraction, spent all his time in concocting dishes for him-
``He told Crossley! I wonder why.'' She was so interested in this new phase that she did not see his outstretched hand, or the look of bitter irony that came into his eyes at this proof of the subordinate place love and he had in her thoughts.
``I'm nervous and anxious,'' she said apologetically. ``Moldini told me he had some scheme about getting the money. If he only could! But no such luck for me,'' she added sadly.
Keith hesitated, debated with himself, said: ``You needn't worry. Moldini got it--from Crossley. Fifty dollars a week for a year.''
``You got Crossley to do it?''
``No. He had done it before I saw him. He had just promised Moldini and was cursing himself as `weak and soft.' But that means nothing. You may be sure he did it because Moldini convinced him it was a good speculation.''
She was radiant. She had not vanity enough where he was concerned to believe that he deeply cared, that her joy would give him pain because it meant forgetfulness of him. Nor was she much impressed by the expression of his eyes. And even as she hurt him, she made him love her the more; for he appreciated how rare was the woman who, in such circumstances, does not feed her vanity with pity for the poor man suffering so horribly because he is not to get her precious self.
It flashed upon her why he had not offered to help her. ``There isn't anybody like you,'' said she, with no explanation of her apparent irrelevancy.
``Don't let Moldini see that you know,'' said he, with characteristic fine thoughtfulness for others in the midst of his own unhappiness. ``It would deprive him of a great pleasure.''
He was about to go. Suddenly her eyes filled and, opening the outer door, she drew him in. ``Donald,'' she said, ``I love you. Take me in your arms and make me behave.''
He looked past her; his arms hung at his sides. Said he: ``And to-night I'd get a note by messenger saying that you had taken it all back. No, the girl in the photograph--that was you. She wasn't made to be MY wife. Or I to be her husband. I love you because you are what you are. I should not love you if you were the ordinary woman, the sort who marries and merges. But I'm old enough to spare myself--and you--the consequences of what it would mean if we were anything but strangers to each other.''
``Yes, you must keep away--altogether. If you didn't, I'd be neither the one thing nor the other, but just a poor failure.''
``You'll not fail,'' said he. ``I know it. It's written in your face.'' He looked at her. She was not looking at him, but with eyes gazing straight ahead was revealing that latent, inexplicable power which, when it appeared at the surface, so strongly dominated and subordinated her beauty and her sex. He shut his teeth together hard and glanced away.
``You will not fail,'' he repeated bitterly. ``And that's the worst of it.''
Without another word, without a handshake, he went. And she knew that, except by chance, he would never see her again--or she him.
Moldini, disheveled and hysterical with delight and suspense, was in the drawing-room--had been there half an hour. At first she could hardly force her mind to listen; but as he talked on and on, he captured her attention and held it.
The next day she began with Moldini, and put the Lucia Rivi system into force in all its more than conventual rigors. And for about a month she worked like a devouring flame. Never had there been such energy, such enthusiasm. Mrs. Belloc was alarmed for her health, but the Rivi system took care of that; and presently Mrs. Belloc was moved to say, ``Well, I've often heard that hard work never harmed anyone, but I never believed it. Now I know the truth.''
Then Mildred went to Hanging Rock to spend Saturday to Monday with her mother. Presbury, reduced now by various infirmities--by absolute deafness, by dimness of sight, by difficulty in walking--to where eating was his sole remaining pleasure, or, indeed, distraction, spent all his time in concocting dishes for him-