The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists [238]
to do anything properly: he was always tearing his bloody guts out! Why, he'd only been in this room about four hours from start to finish! He ought to have a watering cart to follow him about, because he worked at such a hell of a rate you couldn't see him for dust! And then the first man would reply that other people could do as they liked, but for his part, HE was not going to tear his guts out for nobody!
The second man would applaud these sentiments and say that he wasn't going to tear his out either: and then they would both go back to their respective rooms and tear into the work for all they were worth, making the same sort of `job' as the one they had been criticizing, and afterwards, when the other's back was turned, each of them in turn would sneak into the other's room and criticize it and point out the faults to anyone else who happened to be near at hand.
Harlow was working at the place that had been Macaroni's Cafe when one day a note was sent to him from Hunter at the shop. It was written on a scrap of wallpaper, and worded in the usual manner of such notes - as if the writer had studied how to avoid all suspicion of being unduly civil:
Harlow go to the yard at once take your tools with you. Crass will tell you where you have to go. J.H.
They were just finishing their dinners when the boy brought this note; and after reading it aloud for the benefit of the others, Harlow remarked that it was worded in much the same way in which one would speak to a dog. The others said nothing; but after he was gone the other men - who all considered that it was ridiculous for the `likes of us' to expect or wish to be treated with common civility - laughed about it, and said that Harlow was beginning to think he was Somebody: they supposed it was through readin' all those books what Owen was always lendin' 'im. And then one of them got a piece of paper and wrote a note to be given to Harlow at the first opportunity. This note was properly worded, written in a manner suitable for a gentleman like him, neatly folded and addressed:
Mr Harlow Esq., c/o Macaroni's Royal Cafe till called for.
Mister Harlow, Dear Sir: Wood you kinely oblige me bi cummin to the paint shop as soon as you can make it convenient as there is a sealin' to be wate-woshed hoppin this is not trubbling you to much
I remane Yours respeckfully Pontius Pilate.
This note was read out for the amusement of the company and afterwards stored away in the writer's pocket till such a time as an opportunity should occur of giving it to Harlow.
As the writer of the note was on his way back to his room to resume work he was accosted by a man who had gone into Harlow's room to criticize it, and had succeeded in finding several faults which he pointed out to the other, and of course they were both very much disgusted with Harlow.
`I can't think why the coddy keeps him on the job,' said the first man. `Between you and me, if I had charge of a job, and Misery sent Harlow there - I'd send 'im back to the shop.'
`Same as you,' agreed the other as he went back to tear into his own room. `Same as you, old man: I shouldn't 'ave 'im neither.'
It must not be supposed from this that either of these two men were on exceptionally bad terms with Harlow; they were just as good friends with him - to his face - as they were with each other - to each other's faces - and it was just their way: that was all.
If it had been one or both of these two who had gone away instead of Harlow, just the same things would have been said about them by the others who remained - it was merely their usual way of speaking about each other behind each other's backs.
It was always the same: if any one of them made a mistake or had an accident or got into any trouble he seldom or never got any sympathy from
The second man would applaud these sentiments and say that he wasn't going to tear his out either: and then they would both go back to their respective rooms and tear into the work for all they were worth, making the same sort of `job' as the one they had been criticizing, and afterwards, when the other's back was turned, each of them in turn would sneak into the other's room and criticize it and point out the faults to anyone else who happened to be near at hand.
Harlow was working at the place that had been Macaroni's Cafe when one day a note was sent to him from Hunter at the shop. It was written on a scrap of wallpaper, and worded in the usual manner of such notes - as if the writer had studied how to avoid all suspicion of being unduly civil:
Harlow go to the yard at once take your tools with you. Crass will tell you where you have to go. J.H.
They were just finishing their dinners when the boy brought this note; and after reading it aloud for the benefit of the others, Harlow remarked that it was worded in much the same way in which one would speak to a dog. The others said nothing; but after he was gone the other men - who all considered that it was ridiculous for the `likes of us' to expect or wish to be treated with common civility - laughed about it, and said that Harlow was beginning to think he was Somebody: they supposed it was through readin' all those books what Owen was always lendin' 'im. And then one of them got a piece of paper and wrote a note to be given to Harlow at the first opportunity. This note was properly worded, written in a manner suitable for a gentleman like him, neatly folded and addressed:
Mr Harlow Esq., c/o Macaroni's Royal Cafe till called for.
Mister Harlow, Dear Sir: Wood you kinely oblige me bi cummin to the paint shop as soon as you can make it convenient as there is a sealin' to be wate-woshed hoppin this is not trubbling you to much
I remane Yours respeckfully Pontius Pilate.
This note was read out for the amusement of the company and afterwards stored away in the writer's pocket till such a time as an opportunity should occur of giving it to Harlow.
As the writer of the note was on his way back to his room to resume work he was accosted by a man who had gone into Harlow's room to criticize it, and had succeeded in finding several faults which he pointed out to the other, and of course they were both very much disgusted with Harlow.
`I can't think why the coddy keeps him on the job,' said the first man. `Between you and me, if I had charge of a job, and Misery sent Harlow there - I'd send 'im back to the shop.'
`Same as you,' agreed the other as he went back to tear into his own room. `Same as you, old man: I shouldn't 'ave 'im neither.'
It must not be supposed from this that either of these two men were on exceptionally bad terms with Harlow; they were just as good friends with him - to his face - as they were with each other - to each other's faces - and it was just their way: that was all.
If it had been one or both of these two who had gone away instead of Harlow, just the same things would have been said about them by the others who remained - it was merely their usual way of speaking about each other behind each other's backs.
It was always the same: if any one of them made a mistake or had an accident or got into any trouble he seldom or never got any sympathy from