The Ragged Trousered Philanthropists [74]
it will finally pass away. You also imagine you know that we shall live after we're dead; where we shall go, and the kind of existence we shall have. In fact, in the excess of your "humility", you think you know all about it. But really you know no more of these things than any other human being does; that is, you know NOTHING.'
`That's only YOUR opinion,' said Slyme.
`If we care to take the trouble to learn,' Owen went on, `we can know a little of how the universe has grown and changed; but of the beginning we know nothing,'
`That's just my opinion, matey,' observed Philpot. `It's just a bloody mystery, and that's all about it.'
`I don't pretend to 'ave no 'ead knowledge,' said Slyme, `but 'ead knowledge won't save a man's soul: it's 'EART knowledge as does that. I knows in my 'eart as my sins is all hunder the Blood, and it's knowin' that, wot's given 'appiness and the peace which passes all understanding to me ever since I've been a Christian.'
`Glory, glory, hallelujah!' shouted Bundy, and nearly everyone laughed.
`"Christian" is right,' sneered Owen. `You've got some title to call yourself a Christian, haven't you? As for the happiness that passes all understanding, it certainly passes MY understanding how you can be happy when you believe that millions of people are being tortured in Hell; and it also passes my understanding why you are not ashamed of yourself for being happy under such circumstances.'
`Ah, well, you'll find it all out when you come to die, mate,' replied Slyme in a threatening tone. `You'll think and talk different then!'
`That's just wot gets over ME,' observed Harlow. `It don't seem right that after living in misery and poverty all our bloody lives, workin' and slavin' all the hours that Gord A'mighty sends, that we're to be bloody well set fire and burned in 'ell for all eternity! It don't seem feasible to me, you know.'
`It's my belief,' said Philpot, profoundly, `that when you're dead, you're done for. That's the end of you.'
`That's what *I* say,' remarked Easton. `As for all this religious business, it's just a money-making dodge. It's the parson's trade, just the same as painting is ours, only there's no work attached to it and the pay's a bloody sight better than ours is.'
`It's their livin', and a bloody good livin' too, if you ask me,' said Bundy.
`Yes,' said Harlow; `they lives on the fat o' the land, and wears the best of everything, and they does nothing for it but talk a lot of twaddle two or three times a week. The rest of the time they spend cadgin' money orf silly old women who thinks it's a sorter fire insurance.'
`It's an old sayin' and a true one,' chimed in the man on the upturned pail. `Parsons and publicans is the worst enemies the workin' man ever 'ad. There may be SOME good 'uns, but they're few and far between.'
`If I could only get a job like the Harchbishop of Canterbury,' said Philpot, solemnly, `I'd leave this firm.'
`So would I,' said Harlow, `if I was the Harchbishop of Canterbury, I'd take my pot and brushes down the office and shy 'em through the bloody winder and tell ole Misery to go to 'ell.'
`Religion is a thing that don't trouble ME much,' remarked Newman; `and as for what happens to you after death, it's a thing I believe in leavin' till you comes to it - there's no sense in meetin' trouble 'arfway. All the things they tells us may be true or they may not, but it takes me all my time to look after THIS world. I don't believe I've been to church more than arf a dozen times since I've been married - that's over fifteen years ago now - and then it's been when the kids 'ave been christened. The old woman goes sometimes and of course the young 'uns goes; you've got to tell 'em something or other, and they might as well learn what they teaches at the Sunday School as anything else.'
A general murmur of approval greeted this. It seemed to be the almost unanimous opinion, that, whether it were true or not, `religion' was a nice thing to teach children.
`I've not been even once since I was married,'
`That's only YOUR opinion,' said Slyme.
`If we care to take the trouble to learn,' Owen went on, `we can know a little of how the universe has grown and changed; but of the beginning we know nothing,'
`That's just my opinion, matey,' observed Philpot. `It's just a bloody mystery, and that's all about it.'
`I don't pretend to 'ave no 'ead knowledge,' said Slyme, `but 'ead knowledge won't save a man's soul: it's 'EART knowledge as does that. I knows in my 'eart as my sins is all hunder the Blood, and it's knowin' that, wot's given 'appiness and the peace which passes all understanding to me ever since I've been a Christian.'
`Glory, glory, hallelujah!' shouted Bundy, and nearly everyone laughed.
`"Christian" is right,' sneered Owen. `You've got some title to call yourself a Christian, haven't you? As for the happiness that passes all understanding, it certainly passes MY understanding how you can be happy when you believe that millions of people are being tortured in Hell; and it also passes my understanding why you are not ashamed of yourself for being happy under such circumstances.'
`Ah, well, you'll find it all out when you come to die, mate,' replied Slyme in a threatening tone. `You'll think and talk different then!'
`That's just wot gets over ME,' observed Harlow. `It don't seem right that after living in misery and poverty all our bloody lives, workin' and slavin' all the hours that Gord A'mighty sends, that we're to be bloody well set fire and burned in 'ell for all eternity! It don't seem feasible to me, you know.'
`It's my belief,' said Philpot, profoundly, `that when you're dead, you're done for. That's the end of you.'
`That's what *I* say,' remarked Easton. `As for all this religious business, it's just a money-making dodge. It's the parson's trade, just the same as painting is ours, only there's no work attached to it and the pay's a bloody sight better than ours is.'
`It's their livin', and a bloody good livin' too, if you ask me,' said Bundy.
`Yes,' said Harlow; `they lives on the fat o' the land, and wears the best of everything, and they does nothing for it but talk a lot of twaddle two or three times a week. The rest of the time they spend cadgin' money orf silly old women who thinks it's a sorter fire insurance.'
`It's an old sayin' and a true one,' chimed in the man on the upturned pail. `Parsons and publicans is the worst enemies the workin' man ever 'ad. There may be SOME good 'uns, but they're few and far between.'
`If I could only get a job like the Harchbishop of Canterbury,' said Philpot, solemnly, `I'd leave this firm.'
`So would I,' said Harlow, `if I was the Harchbishop of Canterbury, I'd take my pot and brushes down the office and shy 'em through the bloody winder and tell ole Misery to go to 'ell.'
`Religion is a thing that don't trouble ME much,' remarked Newman; `and as for what happens to you after death, it's a thing I believe in leavin' till you comes to it - there's no sense in meetin' trouble 'arfway. All the things they tells us may be true or they may not, but it takes me all my time to look after THIS world. I don't believe I've been to church more than arf a dozen times since I've been married - that's over fifteen years ago now - and then it's been when the kids 'ave been christened. The old woman goes sometimes and of course the young 'uns goes; you've got to tell 'em something or other, and they might as well learn what they teaches at the Sunday School as anything else.'
A general murmur of approval greeted this. It seemed to be the almost unanimous opinion, that, whether it were true or not, `religion' was a nice thing to teach children.
`I've not been even once since I was married,'