The Rolling Stones and Philosophy_ It's Just a Thought Away - Luke Dick [89]
The two led lives similar to rock stars, traveling the world, speaking to droves of people, and seducing at will. Their pact facilitated a free-loving lifestyle without breaking the promise they made to each other. In keeping with existentialism, the two defined the parameters of their own relationship. Rather than relying upon some traditional or religious criteria, they chose their own rules. De Beauvoir explains the nature of her relationship with Sartre in The Prime of Life, saying, “The comradeship that welded our lives together made a superfluous mockery of any other bond we might have forged ourselves.”
The honesty of this pact eludes the kind of tension found in Jagger’s and Watts’s situation. There is no want of other lovers, since they are free to pursue whomever they please, nor guilt from breaking the promise of monogamy. Their only promise was to be free and communicative with each other. They would have certain days and nights where they would meet together, eat together, work together, but their relationship was mostly intellectual once the initial passion wore off.
By many accounts, there are few instances of problems that seem any more emotionally trying than a monogamous relationship. But, there were other kinds of casualties—both emotional and physical. De Beauvoir’s father told her she would never amount to “more than a worm’s whore.” Ouch. Even within Sartre and de Beauvoir’s relationship, allowing one’s lover to share the bed of another can take its toll, though they seemed to manage better than most with this aspect. Despite their pact of truth with each other, neither philosopher fully extended that pact to their other lovers, and there were lies and abortions abound. They would steal each others lovers, and seduce the mates of each other’s lovers. Tension, indeed.
Get What You Need
I’ve seen more marriages fail than succeed. For one reason or another, some person leaves, not getting what they want or need. Individuals have become more independent in our age, and there is less practical need for a couple to remain intact, as in an agrarian society. The emphasis on romantic connection seems to trump the sheer domestic benefits of lifelong monogamy. Even in the relationships that work, there are a million small heartbreaks. Perhaps by sexual incompatibility, perhaps by financial problems, or perhaps by a lack of an intellectual connection, monogamy has a way of breaking hearts and happiness every bit as much as breakups. I’ve heard of embittered fifty-year relationships maintained even in the face of blatant and repeated adultery. In these cases, one is left holding onto the promise they made, choosing to believe that keeping promises and keeping the kids and the family under one roof is best. For Charlie Watts, to “get what you need” is to keep the beat at all costs.
For Mick, it often takes seducing some new beautiful starlet to “get what you need.” Without his flamboyant karate kicks and finger pointing, it would never have been the Rolling Stones. Their brand of rock’n’roll requires seduction, and he seems to love being the voice of it. But being the voice of seduction is certainly different from being the whole thing. Mick is not the drummer, nor a guitar player, nor the sole creative force. His solo efforts haven’t been nearly as impressive as The Stones’ records (though I have a soft spot for “Wandering Spirit”).
Perhaps there’s revelation in the fact that Charlie Watts knocked Mick out after Mick phoned him, asking, “Where’s my drummer?” Try as he might, Mick just can’t be all things