The Rosary [109]
she who might have the finest of the wheat, the full corn in the ear, herself?"
"She," said Garth, "has refused it. It was neither fine enough nor full enough. It was not worthy. O my God, little girl--! What it means, to appear inadequate to the woman one loves!"
Garth dropped his face between his hands with a groan.
Silence unbroken reigned in the library.
Suddenly Garth began to speak, low and quickly, without lifting his head.
"Now," he said, "now I feel it, just as I told Brand, and never so clearly before, excepting once, when I was alone. Ah, Miss Gray! Don't move! Don't stir! But look all round the room and tell me whether you see anything. Look at the window. Look at the door. Lean forward and look behind the screen. I cannot believe we are alone. I will not believe it. I am being deceived in my blindness. And yet--I am NOT deceived. I am conscious of the presence of the woman I love. Her eyes are fixed upon me in pity, sorrow, and compassion. Her grief at my woe is so great that it almost enfolds me, as I had dreamed her love would do . . . O my God! She is so near--and it is so terrible, because I do not wish her near. I would sooner a thousand miles were between us--and I am certain there are not many yards! . . . Is it psychic? or is it actual? or am I going mad? . . . Miss Gray! YOU would not lie to me. No persuasion or bribery or confounded chicanery could induce YOU to deceive me on this point. Look around, for God's sake, and tell me! Are we alone? And if not, WHO IS IN THE ROOM besides you and me?"
Jane had been sitting with her arms folded upon the table, her yearning eyes fixed upon Garth's bowed head. When he wished her a thousand miles away she buried her face upon them. She was so near him that had Garth stretched out his right hand again, it would have touched the heavy coils of her soft hair. But Garth did not raise his head, and Jane still sat with her face buried.
There was silence in the library for a few moments after Garth's question and appeal. Then Jane lifted her face.
"There is no one in the room, Mr. Dalmain," said Nurse Rosemary, "but YOU--and ME."
CHAPTER XXVII
THE EYES GARTH TRUSTED
"So you enjoy motoring, Miss Gray?"
They had been out in the motor together for the first time, and were now having tea together in the library, also for the first time; and, for the first time, Nurse Rosemary was pouring out for her patient. This was only Monday afternoon, and already her week-end experience had won for her many new privileges.
"Yes, I like it, Mr. Dalmain; particularly in this beautiful air."
"Have you had a case before in a house where they kept a motor?"
Nurse Rosemary hesitated. "Yes, I have stayed in houses where they had motors, and I have been in Dr. Brand's. He met me at Charing Cross once with his electric brougham."
"Ah, I know," said Garth. "Very neat. On your way to a case, or returning from a case?"
Nurse Rosemary smiled, then bit her lip. "To a case," she replied quite gravely. "I was on my way to his house to talk it over and receive instructions."
"It must be splendid working under such a fellow as Brand," said Garth; "and yet I am certain most of the best things you do are quite your own idea. For instance, he did not suggest your week-end plan, did he? I thought not. Ah, the difference it has made! Now tell me. When we were motoring we never slowed up suddenly to pass anything, or tooted to make something move out of the way, without your having already told me what we were going to pass or what was in the road a little way ahead. It was: 'We shall be passing a hay cart at the next bend; there will be just room, but we shall have to slow up'; or, 'An old red cow is in the very middle of the road a little way on. I think she will move if we hoot.' Then, when the sudden slow down and swerve came, or the toot toot of the horn, I knew all about it and was not taken unawares. Did you know how trying it is in blindness to be speeding along and suddenly alter pace without having any idea why, or swerve to one side,
"She," said Garth, "has refused it. It was neither fine enough nor full enough. It was not worthy. O my God, little girl--! What it means, to appear inadequate to the woman one loves!"
Garth dropped his face between his hands with a groan.
Silence unbroken reigned in the library.
Suddenly Garth began to speak, low and quickly, without lifting his head.
"Now," he said, "now I feel it, just as I told Brand, and never so clearly before, excepting once, when I was alone. Ah, Miss Gray! Don't move! Don't stir! But look all round the room and tell me whether you see anything. Look at the window. Look at the door. Lean forward and look behind the screen. I cannot believe we are alone. I will not believe it. I am being deceived in my blindness. And yet--I am NOT deceived. I am conscious of the presence of the woman I love. Her eyes are fixed upon me in pity, sorrow, and compassion. Her grief at my woe is so great that it almost enfolds me, as I had dreamed her love would do . . . O my God! She is so near--and it is so terrible, because I do not wish her near. I would sooner a thousand miles were between us--and I am certain there are not many yards! . . . Is it psychic? or is it actual? or am I going mad? . . . Miss Gray! YOU would not lie to me. No persuasion or bribery or confounded chicanery could induce YOU to deceive me on this point. Look around, for God's sake, and tell me! Are we alone? And if not, WHO IS IN THE ROOM besides you and me?"
Jane had been sitting with her arms folded upon the table, her yearning eyes fixed upon Garth's bowed head. When he wished her a thousand miles away she buried her face upon them. She was so near him that had Garth stretched out his right hand again, it would have touched the heavy coils of her soft hair. But Garth did not raise his head, and Jane still sat with her face buried.
There was silence in the library for a few moments after Garth's question and appeal. Then Jane lifted her face.
"There is no one in the room, Mr. Dalmain," said Nurse Rosemary, "but YOU--and ME."
CHAPTER XXVII
THE EYES GARTH TRUSTED
"So you enjoy motoring, Miss Gray?"
They had been out in the motor together for the first time, and were now having tea together in the library, also for the first time; and, for the first time, Nurse Rosemary was pouring out for her patient. This was only Monday afternoon, and already her week-end experience had won for her many new privileges.
"Yes, I like it, Mr. Dalmain; particularly in this beautiful air."
"Have you had a case before in a house where they kept a motor?"
Nurse Rosemary hesitated. "Yes, I have stayed in houses where they had motors, and I have been in Dr. Brand's. He met me at Charing Cross once with his electric brougham."
"Ah, I know," said Garth. "Very neat. On your way to a case, or returning from a case?"
Nurse Rosemary smiled, then bit her lip. "To a case," she replied quite gravely. "I was on my way to his house to talk it over and receive instructions."
"It must be splendid working under such a fellow as Brand," said Garth; "and yet I am certain most of the best things you do are quite your own idea. For instance, he did not suggest your week-end plan, did he? I thought not. Ah, the difference it has made! Now tell me. When we were motoring we never slowed up suddenly to pass anything, or tooted to make something move out of the way, without your having already told me what we were going to pass or what was in the road a little way ahead. It was: 'We shall be passing a hay cart at the next bend; there will be just room, but we shall have to slow up'; or, 'An old red cow is in the very middle of the road a little way on. I think she will move if we hoot.' Then, when the sudden slow down and swerve came, or the toot toot of the horn, I knew all about it and was not taken unawares. Did you know how trying it is in blindness to be speeding along and suddenly alter pace without having any idea why, or swerve to one side,