The Stranger - Max Frei [153]
“I’m a swine,” Melifaro admitted, sounding aggrieved. “I’m inviting you. Today. No matter how much work there is, we still have to fill our bellies.”
“It’s nice to hear such pearls of wisdom. Mind you, it’s the Hunchback Itullo or nothing.”
“I wouldn’t settle for less. Do I have your permission to depart, Sir Great Commander?”
“Permission granted. Hey, wake me up in about two hours, all right? I have a date with a beautiful lady.”
“Maybe I could stand in for you?” Melifaro said enthusiastically.
“Dream on. You’re not quite the man inconsolable widows are searching for. Moreover, you’ll be meeting the magnificent Sir Lookfi at that time. Have you forgotten? Anyway, let me get some sleep!”
“Right here?”
“Yes. If I go home, wild horses wouldn’t be able to drag me out from under the blanket.”
“True. It’s virtually impossible to get out from under your blanket,” Melifaro said with the confident air of an expert. “Did you cast a spell over it? And what if Juffin comes here and wants to get some work done?”
“It won’t bother me,” I said, rearranging the chairs into the pitiful likeness of a bed.
“It’s beginning to dawn on me,” Melifaro mused. “You’ve done away with our unfortunate chief, and now—”
“If you don’t let me get some sleep, I’ll do away with you,” I mumbled, already feeling the sweet tug of slumber. “I’ve changed my mind. Wake me up in two and a half hours, not two. In fact, make it three. And tell Urf to feed my cats. I just promised them yesterday that life was getting back to normal.”
“All right, go to sleep. I’ll take care of everything. Otherwise you might start spitting,” said Melifaro, and he disappeared out the door.
It seemed I had closed my eyes for no more than a minute. When I opened them again, Melifaro was there, looking down at me.
“Well, what now?” I said.
“What do you mean ‘what now’? You asked me to wake you up. Come on, upsy-daisy, Mr. Bad Dream. It’s time for me to go to the Main Archive. Besides, I’ve got some news for you.”
“A hole in the heavens above this World!” With a groan I tore my head away from the spot where normal people usually have a pillow. “It’s already been three hours? How unfair!”
“Three and a half,” said Melifaro, handing me a mug of hot kamra. “Juffin hides the Elixir of Kaxar in the lower left drawer of the desk. He made the bottle invisible, but you’ll find it if you fish around for it.”
“I know how to find it without your prompting,” I growled. I tore into Juffin’s desk drawer with the express goal of appropriating his personal property. A few seconds later, I was chomping at the bit to move a mountain or two.
“Now I can at least stand being around you,” Melifaro said approvingly. “Have you known about this hiding place a long time?”
“Since my first day on the job. After the scandalous adventure of the Soup of Repose, our chief realized that Elixir of Kaxar provided me with my only chance to wallow in vice. So, what’s the news?”
“First, our department: Melamori couldn’t find any traces of intruders or strangers. Except yours, of course. As you predicted. Master Mouthful-Earful hasn’t reported back yet. On the other hand, the City Police have a piece of news that makes everything else pale by comparison. Boboota has disappeared.”
“What?!” I spluttered, spewing kamra everywhere. “Are you serious?”
“Never been more so. He left for his meal right after the Royal Showering of Gifts. Since then, no one has seen him. His subordinates figured that the General had gone home, and were too happy to entertain any doubts. His servants at home thought Boboota was on duty. I think they were quite happy with the situation, as well. This morning, his wife finally decided to send a call to her beloved Boboota.”
“And?”
“Very strange, Max. He’s alive—Lady Box is sure of that. He’s alive, but he doesn’t respond to any calls, as though he is sleeping very soundly.”
“And Melamori? Has she been looking for him?”
“She’s still looking.”
“How’s that? I thought she worked fast.”
“That’s just it. In the Chancellery of Encouragement there’s not a trace of Boboota.