The Stranger - Max Frei [186]
“By the way, Kofa, do you know what Melifaro calls you?”
“Of course I do. What do you expect from the Master Eavesdropper-Gobbler? I see nothing wrong with it. Who are you to laugh, Mr. Bad Dream?”
Much to my surprise, we went right past our favorite Glutton Bunba.
“You come here almost every day with Juffin, anyway. He’s so conservative,” Kofa said dismissively. “He’s convinced that the Glutton is as good as it gets. The cuisine in the Glutton is good, I admit. But every day the same thing—that’s too dull!”
First we went to the Merry Little Skeletons. The numerous Skeletons scattered about Echo reminded me of the McDonald’s of my homeland. I smiled.
“What is it?” Kofa asked, taking a seat in the far corner of the room.
“Oh, nothing. I was just thinking that there are too many ‘skeletons’ in Echo.”
“Do you know the story behind them? Of course, you don’t. Juffin has never had a clue about which stories are the most interesting ones. So listen up. The proprietor of all the Skeletons is Goppa Tallaboona. You’ve seen him—he brought all his cooks over to the Ministry. The fellow comes from a wealthy family, the Tallaboona clan, descendants of gourmands. Back in the day, they were very influential people. These gentlemen so loved to eat, and to eat well, that sometime after the beginning of the Code Epoch they fell into despair. They gathered together and ordered their cooks to prepare food as they had done in the ‘old days’—that is, not neglecting to use Forbidden Magic. And they ate fit to burst. Those were happier times, back then; Juffin and I had our hands full already with other matters. When we were able to find a half-hour to look in on the Tallaboonas, there was no one to arrest: only dead bodies. Some of them weren’t able to eat so much, so they lost the spark. They got food poisoning. Nice story, isn’t it? Goppa received a huge inheritance, including the houses of his relatives, and in them he opened his taverns. It’s funny, since Goppa had always practiced asceticism in his youth. He constantly quarreled with his elders, and felt nothing but contempt for the family traditions. He didn’t take part in their final feast, of course. They say that to this day Goppa eats only sandwiches, and I believe it. The fellow has a very original sense of humor. Look over there.”
Sir Kofa pointed to a brightly lighted niche at the opposite end of the room. There was a small table with two small skeletons sitting in state.
“They’re real, Max. The real skeletons of Goppa’s late relatives. You’ll find them in every one of his establishments, if you recall. And the name of each tavern accurately describes the character of the deceased. The master and mistress of this house were a married couple—both of them small in stature and truly merry people. Good people. They were friends of mine. Now they’re going to serve us something special, so save your strength, Max. The chefs here are still the same ones. The Tallaboonas have always been able to afford the very best. The solemn moment has arrived—they’re bringing out the Big Puff!”
When I looked at the head chef wheeling his cart in the direction of our table, I was nonplussed. The fellow’s cart was laden with something that looked like Chinese dumplings, except that each dumpling was about three feet in width.
“Sir Kofa, I do love to eat, of course,” I whispered. “But I’m afraid you have overestimated my abilities.”
“Don’t be silly, boy. It’s going to be all right. Be quiet now, and watch.”
When he stopped at our table, the cook bowed in a dignified manner and placed two relatively small plates in front of us. I had no time to wonder how the small plates could accommodate the Big Puffs before the cook grasped the uppermost dumpling carefully between two small shovels. Then he began to blow on it. He blew as gently and patiently as a grandmother blowing on a spoonful of oatmeal,