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he does not have a good library; he is occupied with his new cleaning job; he must first have a publisher; he needs more office space; he needs a secretary; he needs a typewriter, preferably a portable Corona; he needs money for supplies. And, Joseph adds, he needs courage and pluck. “Perhaps,” Joseph says, “the letters I have written to Dr. Yoder could be published? Along with his? Read this letter carefully and see if it is not worthy of being published. I have seen such letters of this type published before, but not as good as mine, by a long shot. They were much cheaper.”

March 7. Dr. Yoder replies in this vein: “You say you need courage and pluck. I hereby give you the strength to have courage and pluck, loving you as I do, loving you as a father loves a son. Have the courage and pluck to be a penniless writer, starting out to write without secretaries.” And so on.

March 9. Joseph says he doesn’t have time to write and that he isn’t ready. “You have to have the head for it.”

It is clear we have learned all we are going to about Joseph’s reaction to writing. To continue along this line would only be to increase his anxiety. It is time to put an end to it.

March 14

My dear Joseph:

If you would feel better by not writing, then I urge you not to write literature.

If you wish to write something, all right. I think that what would be interesting to write about is the psychology of identity, about which psychology and psychiatry know so little as yet. Would you be interested in writing a short article on your identity, and on the identity of the other two gentlemen with whom you have meetings? … However, I wish to make it perfectly clear that if for any reason whatsoever you do not wish to write, you do not have to. Write such an article only if you are interested in doing so. If not, then perhaps we should drop altogether the whole matter of writing literature.

Whichever way you decide, be completely assured that I will continue to love you like a father loves his own son.

Cordially,

O. R. Yoder, M.D.

March 15

My dear Dad:

Thank you for your writing that I have the choice of writing literature or no … I am not writing literature for a while ’cause I am not quite ready for it, and I ask of you to give me the grant to write later. . . .

… As for the psychology of identity, it is quite tempting to write anent, as you suggest, but I think I should write this later. One wishes to be oneself, to look like himself, and the will of one person is awfully needful for the obtaining and keeping of one’s identity … You are quite right that “psychology and psychiatry know so little as yet about identity.” This should be written by a good author … it ought to be taken out of closets and written for the reader in a literary form, the same as The Story of Philosophy by Will Durant, The Human Body by Logan Clendenning, The Outline of History by H. G. Wells, The Story of Mankind by Hendrik Willem Van Loon. . . .

Yes, I am attending church still. I have attended Catholic Church, but of late I have attended Protestant and Jewish services. I do not wish to commit myself to write which I prefer, Catholic, Protestant, Jewish. I love the One-God idea of religion, but Catholic religion is very historical and strong … religion is so essential, delicate, and necessitous. . . .

Knowledge does so much to you, ignorance kills you and makes you sickly.

Yours truly,

Joseph Cassel

One of the curious aspects of Joseph’s church-going is that despite the fact that he is a Catholic he does not attend Catholic services. How would Joseph react to a suggestion from Dr. Yoder that he attend such services?

March 16

Dear dad:

In answer to your letter of March 16, I wish to write that your letter was quite unexpected. However, since you want me to write a report on the “Catholic Church” and what their services are like I hereby ask of you to read what follows. But, as for my attending Catholic service, I wish to write that I first attended Catholic service for quite or for an enough-while that I remember what Catholic service is like. From the