The Three Musketeers (The Modern Library) - Alexandre Dumas [138]
“The fingers,” the Jesuit insisted, “Saint Peter blessed with the fingers; the Pope therefore blesses with his fingers. And with how many fingers does he perform the benediction? With three, naturally: one for the Father, one for the Son, and one for the Holy Ghost.”
Seeing the three disputants cross themselves, D’Artagnan did likewise. The Jesuit droned on:
“His Holiness the Pope is the direct successor of Saint Peter; he therefore represents the three divine powers, the Holy Trinity. All others, ordines inferiores or the lower orders of the ecclesiastical hierarchy, bless only in the name of the Archangels and Angels. The humblest clerics, our deacons, say, and our sacristans, bless with Holy Water sprinklers which represent an indefinite number of fingers extended in the act of Holy Benediction!” He sighed. “There,” he continued sententiously, “you have the matter in a nutshell!” But he was not yet done. “Argumentum omni denudatum ornamento, I have presented my argument in unadorned simplicity,” he insisted and, carried away with excitement: “I fully expect to write two volumes meaty as these,” he vowed, slapping an in-folio Saint Chrysostom of such weight and bulk that the table all but collapsed under it.
The impact of his palm and the tremulous table legs caused D’Artagnan to shudder. Aramis broke in.
“I must pay tribute to the beauty of this thesis, Father,” he said humbly, “but it overwhelms me. For my part I had chosen another text and I beg you to tell me if it pleases you, my dear D’Artagnan. It is: Non inutile est desiderium in oblatione, or better, a little regret is not unbecoming in an offering to the Lord.”
“Stop, stop!” the Jesuit warned. “That thesis borders on heresy; I find an almost identical proposition in the Augustinus of Jansenius, the heresiarch whose work will sooner or later be burned by the public executioner. Have a care, my young friend, you seem to incline toward false doctrines that may spell your ruin.”
“Your ruin!” the Curé seconded, shaking his head sorrowfully.
“You are skirting that famous question of free will which is a deadly shoal. You are steering straight for the insinuations of the Pelagians and near-Pelagians.”
“But Reverend Father—” Aramis ventured, somewhat taken aback by the shower of arguments falling about his head.
The Jesuit, giving him no time to make his point, challenged:
“How are you going to prove that we ought to regret the world when we offer ourselves to God? The dilemma is clear; listen! God is God, the World is the Devil, to regret the World is to regret the Devil. That is my conclusion.”
“Mine too,” said the Curé.
“But I beg of you . . .”
“Desideras diabolum, you yearn for the Devil, O unhappy man!” said the Jesuit pontifically.
“Ay, he yearns for the Devil!” the Curé groaned. “Poor young man, I implore you not to hanker after Satan!”
For D’Artagnan the whole scene was incomprehensible and the language so much Greek, let alone Latin. Was this a madhouse? Was he turning as mad as the people in it? Hampered by his lack of dialectic, he sank graciously into silence. Aramis, polite and suave as ever, but with unmistakable symptoms of impatience, was saying:
“Please hear me out, Father. I never said anything about regretting the world or hankering after Satan. You will at least grant that I could not utter a statement so unorthodox—”
As though rehearsed to do so, both Jesuit and Curé raised their arms to Heaven. This gave Aramis a brief inning.
“I appeal to you D’Artagnan, would it not be an act of ill grace to offer to the Lord a gift which filled one with disgust?”
“By God, yes!”
Jesuit and Curé rose simultaneously in their chairs, then sank back.
“I start from this simple syllogism,” Aramis continued. “One: The World is not wanting in charm; Two, I quit the World and thus make a sacrifice; and Three, I obey the injunction of the Scriptures which command us to make a sacrifice unto the Lord.”
“True,” said the Jesuit, and “Yes, yes,” said the Curé.
“What is more, I have written a rondeau about the whole problem.” Aramis pinched his ears to