The Treasure_ A Novel - Iris Johansen [82]
“Don’t be stupid. Of course she’s not the same. Some women need children to complete them. To lose a babe tears the heart from your body. Do you expect her not to show—”
“Gently.” Tarik’s hand fell on her arm. “We all know Selene is in pain. Now we have to find a way to help her.”
“If she’ll let us,” Layla said. “It’s as if she’s built a wall around herself to keep everyone out.”
“She’ll let us,” Kadar said. “Because we’ll do everything we can to make sure she does.” A muscle jerked in his taut cheek. “Do you hear me? I won’t have her hurting like this.”
“Time and patience will help heal the wound,” Tarik said.
“Selene has never understood patience, and I can’t see her learning now.”
“You’re the one who appears to be without patience.”
“She’s hurting. I won’t stand for it. I’m going to fix it.” He glared at Tarik. “And you’re going to help. Whatever it takes, whatever she wants, you’re going to give her.”
“If it’s within my power.”
“That’s not good enough. You’re going to give it to her.” His glance went from Tarik to Layla and back again. “I don’t care what’s between you. I don’t care about the grail. I’m tired of having you and Nasim interfering with our lives. It’s not going to happen anymore.”
“Kadar, I’m not arguing about—”
“She wants to talk to all of us after supper tonight.” He turned and started to stalk back up the hill. “You’re going to listen and, by God, if you say one word to upset her, I’ll make you pay.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Kadar asked.
Selene whirled to see him standing in the doorway of her chamber. His face was pale, his eyes glittering, and she instinctively stiffened. “What are you doing here?”
“Didn’t I have the right to know?” He moved forward and slammed the door. “It was my child, for God’s sake.”
“I was going to tell you.”
“When? This evening? A joint announcement to Tarik and me? You didn’t think I deserved to hear it alone?” His hands fell on her shoulders. “You let Tarik’s wife, a stranger, be the one to tell me.”
She looked away from him. “I didn’t want to talk about it.”
His face softened. “Selene.” His hands gently kneaded her shoulders. “We have to talk about it. We shared the pleasure that created the child, now let me share the pain. I can help you.”
She could feel herself softening, bending toward him like a tree in a strong breeze. He would understand. He had wanted the child.
She mustn’t soften. She had to remain strong and rock hard. “Do you want me to weep and moan? My babe is dead. Haroun is dead. Weeping won’t bring them back.”
“I don’t want you to weep. I want you to let me share. You’re not being fair to me.”
She backed away from him. “I want you to leave me now. I’ll see you this evening.”
“The devil I’ll leave you.” He took a step forward. “You can’t shove me into the background and lump me with Tarik and Layla. We’ve been comrades and lovers. For God’s sake, we’ve conceived a child. We’ve shared too much.”
“That doesn’t matter.”
“It does matter. Nothing matters more than—” He drew a deep breath. “This is wrong. I lost control. I didn’t mean to argue with you. I meant to be all that was gentle and understanding.”
“Then understand that I want you to go.”
“I’m leaving.” He moved toward the door. “And for now I’ll obediently fade into the background where you want me. But it won’t last, Selene. I won’t let it last.”
He did not slam the door, but the closing was crisp and decisive.
He was gone. She crossed her arms across her chest to still their trembling. She had thought she was frozen, but she was coming alive again. She had desperately wanted to reach out and take the comfort he offered. She should have known Kadar would be capable of getting past any barrier and jarring her.
But she hadn’t yielded, and he had left her.
Triumph.
It didn’t feel like triumph. It felt bitter and uncertain and very, very lonely.
Kadar’s hands clenched into fists as he walked blindly down the hall.
She was in pain and he couldn’t help her.
By God, he